Saturday Smoking Lounge: Tareyton As High Art

Tareyton's became one of the first, more or less, light cigarettes, in the 60's when they introduced some kind of charcoal filter.

In prep school, one of our proctors (a senior who was 17 years old or so) would have his mother buy him a carton of Tareyton's every week or so.

We would think it a matter of high scientific exploration to take apart his Tareyton filters to find the little mound of granulated charcoal inside.

But in the 50's, before they instituted this great smoking innovation, and before they came out with their famous, "I'd rather fight than switch," commercials, it seems that Tareyton was best known for the high art of its TV commercials as in the following Tareyton TV ad:



Today in this benighted era of tacit tobacco prohibition, Tareytons are still available, but only at specialty tobacco shops or on-line.

Arne Duncan: Let's Double Bloated Teachers' Salaries

Arne "Goober" Duncan

Arne Duncan is Obama's education Czar who was the mastermind of the laughably inept Chicago Public School System, where a full 6% of high school freshmen will earn a bachelor's degree by age 25.

Exhibiting the same jackassery that animated his Chicago performance, Duncan said Friday that we should double the salaries of America's unionized government school teachers.

Apparently no one sent Duncan the memo which shows that most government school teachers are as wildly overpaid as they are poorly educated.

Make no mistake about it, government school teachers are ridiculously overpaid. A full 55% of the teachers at the Highland Park/Deerfield High School pull down more than six figures a year for their 9 month gigs.

Retired Illinois teachers haul in up to 85% of their highest career salaries for life. That is why, in some downstate Illinois towns, the richest person is a retired public school teacher.

But Arne Duncan says taxpayers should double their salaries.

This prompted WLS radio talker, Don Wade, on Tuesday to wonder aloud, "Who are these people in the Obama White House?"

It prompted me to add aloud, "And what planet did they come from?"

Here, from the Family Taxpayers Foundation Teachers salary database are the top 200 salaries of Illinois Public school employees for 2010. Arne Duncan says they should be doubled:


All Districts for for 2010:

Russell, Lucille $413,000
Engler, Thomas $350,154
Dada, M Mohsin $341,747
Fleming, Larry $334,912
Lamberson, Jonathan $318,324
Giannetti, Glen $307,471
Many, Thomas $299,600
Harper, John $297,605
May, Loren $292,157
Mical, Gary $288,564

Amnesty For Jailed Illegals in Fantasyland Cook County

Amnesty author "Chuy" Garcia at ICIRR rally

The illegal alien lobbyists of the Illinois Coalition for Immigrant and Refugee Rights (ICIRR) were positively abuzz will glee over the Cook County Board's Wednesday vote to grant de facto amnesty to Chicago's border jumpers.

By a 10-5 vote, that august body decreed that illegal aliens currently residing in the Cook County hoosegow should be set free to prowl Chicago's streets. This rather than turn them over to the deportation-obsessed storm troopers of the ICE.

Board members and the ever-gullible Chicago news media were under the impression that the amnesty would only apply to illegal aliens being held for misdemeanors.But within 24 hours of the diktat, the nation's second largest county was turning illegal alien felons out onto the streets.

The author of the law, Southwest side Democrat Commissioner, Jesus "Chuy" Garcia and his pals at ICIRR appeared jointly to laud the benevolent development.

After all, what's a felony or two by some of Chicago's storm-tossed huddled masses, just yearning to be free and to do jobs the flaccid Americano just won't do?

Cynics will wonder what will transpire when one of the furloughed illegal alien miscreants ends up pulling a Willie Horton a few weeks after release.

Willie Horton

Willie, you will recall, was the fellow furloughed from jail by Massachusetts Governor Mike Dukakis, who while free went on a rape and murder spree.

But while that would be a cause for distress elsewhere, here in fantasyland, multiculturalist PC Chicago it would be no problemo.

You see, the Chicago news media, ever-true to its multiculturalist credo, seldom reports the race or immigration status of such persons when it might be an embarassment to the overall self-esteem of the preferred, protected race or ethnic group.

The editor of the Chicago Tribune has said that this "report-no-evil" is the enlightened policy of his forward thinking journal.

So if one of the released illegal aliens, who should have been deported, goes on a rapacious, murderous crime spree, we simply won't know about it.

Problem solved.

Braille Instructions for Diaper Changing

Most of us by now have seen the profusion of diaper changing stations springing up in the rest rooms of Chicago's fast food joints and other public accomodations.

They're now in all the area McDonald's and Jewel-Osco's.

Thankfully, not having need for their employment, I have seldom paid them much mind. But on one recent visit to such an accomodation, as will happen there, I found myself with time to ponder the device which was hanging on the wall across from the place of my seated repose.

There I discovered that the Koala Kare Products Corporation, of Englewood, Colorado, thoughtfully provided instructions for the use of its diaper changing table in English, Spanish, French, Italian, German, Japanese and Braille.

Now I can understand the need for multi-lingual diaper changing instructions, given the hordes of Germans, Italians and Japanese who are illegally flooding over our borders and snapping up all the child care-diaper changing jobs that Americans just won't do.

But braille?

Do you really want a blind person caring for your kiddie? Do you really want a blind person taking your baby out to a McDonalds, stumbling up to the counter to buy him a Happy Meal and then fumbling his or her way over to the rest room to read the braille instructions before changing his diaper?

I have noticed that Obama has been on the airwaves with a public service announcement touting the wonders of the Americans with Disabilities Act on its 20th anniversary.

These braille diaper changing instructions, are, no doubt, required by the ADA and a testimony to its wonderful works.

But if you feel you really must hire a disabled person to change your baby's diapers, rather than hire a blind person, perhaps it would be best to hire one with anosmia. That dreaded disability is defined as a lack of functioning olfaction, or in other words, an inability to perceive odors.

That would make for a happier child care employee and keep the ADA enforcers of the Obama regime happy too.

Maine Twp. School Dist. 207: Millions For Fat Salaries, Not A Penny For Transparency

Maine East High School

Posted below are the names and 2012 salaries of all teachers and administrators for Maine Township High School District 207.

(Editor's Note: When this article was initially published only the 2010 salaries were available. It has been updated to reflect the 2012 personnel and their salaries.

On June 18, 2012, the Maine Twp. District 207 school board, with only 1 dissenting vote, voted to further increase these exorbitant salaries and to add annual cost of living increases.)

Maine District 207 made the news on July 15th for being one of the area school districts that still refuses to record and put on-line the proceedings of its school board.

Maine East and Maine South and Maine West high schools and the District 207 administrative offices are wired to the hilt -- totally in step with the internet age.

But for parents and taxpayers it's the horse and buggy era. If they want to find out what their elected school board members are up to, they'll have to take off an entire night every month, get a babysitter and physically trek down to South Dee Road in Park Ridge to monitor their own school board.

Dist 207 School Bd.

You would think it would be a simple matter for a school district that has on its payroll a computer installer/repairman who is hauling down $121,274 a year as well as a business computer programmer, to whom they are forking over $106,438 a year, to simply put their meetings on-line.

But the fact is, the Maine Township school board and its fat-salaried administrators would probably just as soon not have pesky parents, taxpayers and reporters looking into what they've been up to.

And from the looks of the wildly opulent teachers salaries they've saddled the taxpayers with, I can see why.

They have an astounding 333 teachers and administrators on their payroll hauling down more than $100k a year.

You can see all of the names and salaries below, but here are some of the highlights of the Maine Twp. High schools wild salary spending spree:

--- 16 Gym Teachers hauling down between $104 and $153k a year.

--- Drivers Ed teachers being paid $149k, $145k and $121k

--- More than 20 Guidance Counselors, only 3 of which are hauling down less than $100k a year.

---Sex Ed. teachers being paid $119k, $114k and $97k

--- $137k drama coaches, $140k art teachers and a $110k dance teacher (Did Maine Twp. manage to land Sir Laurence Olivier, Pablo Picasso and Fred Astaire for these high dollar gigs?)

--- 4 librarians pulling down between $130k and $100k

--- 5 six figure social workers and 3 psychologists making between $116k and $165k

--- 9 English as a second language and bi-lingual ed teachers raking in more than six figures (remember this the next time someone tells you that there are no taxpayer costs to immigration)

And keep in mind, most of these salaries are for 9 months of work.

And keep in mind, most of these high dollar employees were from schools of education, which, according to Professor Walter Williams, are populated by the poorest students in the country with the lowest test scores.

And keep in mind, most of their "Masters degrees" were simply meaningless busy-work degrees, from these very colleges of education, which Williams calls, "the slums of American academia."

Here is a complete list of the salaries from Maine Township High School District 207. It was compiled from the database of the Family Taxpayers Foundation, which demanded them from the State Teachers' Retirement records, under the Freedom of Information Act. You can get more info on the individual payrollee (yrs. of employment, speciality etc.) by simply clicking on the name:

Teacher Salary Database Maine Township HSD 207 2012 - Download data NAME SALARY Abraham, Gilit $120,048 Adams, Allyson $76,565 Adams, Steven $149,474 Addante, Christopher $144,505 Adkins, Kenneth $71,246 Aguirre, Miguel $104,594 Albee, Erin $47,393 Alden, Aileen $94,138 Allen, Amy $137,183 Amidei, Juli $137,390 Archer, Samantha $108,580 Arguello, Jose $111,315 Atkinson, Bruce $135,213 Auge Caliendo, Suzanne $54,972 Awad, Aida $143,184 Bader, Carla $99,609 Bahamon, Rosanna $71,008 Baima, Sharon $128,954 Baker, Susan $100,737 Baldwin, Christine $138,121

Our Ill-Educated Public School Teachers

Prof. Walter Williams

This past Monday, George Mason University Professor, Walter Williams told WLS talk hosts Wolf and Proft that our public high school teachers are generally, the most intellectually challenged, least accomplished, essentially stupid students turned out by our nation's colleges.

The renowned African-American Professor of Economics at 9:55 into the interview said:

"Schools of Education are the slums of academia.

"If you look at SAT scores, the students with the lowest SAT scores become education majors. The professors in the Schools of Education are the least academically respected faculty on the college campuses.

"Students who do graduate with a degree in the College of Education, if they go on to take the LSAT to get into law school or the GRE to get into professional school or the MCATs to get into medical school score the lowest of any students in these graduate exams.

"It just shows there's not a lot of academic quality among people who are educationists."

The Chicago Lampoon has published more than a dozen complete lists of teachers with their salaries from area schools this past year and will do so again in the coming academic year.

The publication of the, usually very bloated, salaries of these unionized government workers usually provokes a wave of outraged comments from the taxpayers who subsidize their above average incomes.

It has also provoked a gaggle of teachers' union apologists from the education establishments to post comments justifying the big salaries.

And one of the most common apologias is that the teaching salarymen very often have advanced degrees. Usually Masters degrees from some school of education.

Which advanced degrees according to Professor Williams, in real academic terms, aren't worth a warm pool of spit.

Skokie, Rogers Park Black Youths Charged in Latest Mob Attack



Stanton Demaret of Skokie
Charged in Black Mob Attack


According to WLS radio news, seven black teenagers have been charged with mob action for beating and robbing a 17-year-old boy late Friday in a brutal attack outside the Cermak-Chinatown CTA station.

Chicago Police and WLS declined to report the race of the 17 year old victim, who was "stomped on" by the mob which stole his cell phone and debit card and pummelled him with their fists and feet. The victim was taken to Stroger Hospital where he was reported in serious condition. He is expected to survive.

Chicago news media have adopted an almost universal policy of refusing to identify the race of the mob attackers and victims although WLS radio has in the past deviated from this policy.

Olagbegi

Two of the attackers were not identified by Chicago police spokesmen because they were 16. One of the five identified assailants was from Skokie and the other four were from Rogers Park.

Charged with one count each of felony robbery, mob action and aggravated battery causing great bodily harm were, Fimi Adedokun, of the 6100 block of North Damen Avenue; Stanton Demaret, of the 8100 block of Knox Avenue in Skokie; Devin Mossiah, of the 6600 block of North Ashland Avenue; Denzel Olagbegi, of the 1400 block of West Pratt Boulevard; and Duwon Polk, of the 1700 block of West Pratt Boulevard.

Police said that the attack which was captured on CTA surveillance cameras, showed several of the thugs making a running leap and pouncing on the victim's head.

The seven black suspects are expected to appear in bond court Saturday.

Illegal Aliens Spawning Chicago Hit And Run Epidemic?

Illegal Alien Hit and Run Suspect

According to Jon Hilkevitch's August 15th report in the Chicago Tribune, Chicago isn't a very safe place to walk.

Over the period 2004-2009, 18,377 pedestrians were mowed down by cars here. And the report noted that about 2 hit-and-run crashes resulting in a pedestrian getting maimed or killed occur every day in Chicago

"Among the more troubling findings of the study commissioned by the Chicago Department of Transportation is that an average of two hit-and-run pedestrian crashes resulting in deaths or injuries take place each day in Chicago. Hit-and-runs account for 33 percent of vehicle-pedestrian collisions and 41 percent of those that are fatal, double the national average, officials said.

That's 5,534 hit-and-runs over the five-year stretch, causing 3,683 deaths and injuries, officials said."

That's a disturbing statistic: Chicago has twice the national average rate of hit-and-run incidents where pedestrians are maimed or killed.

Dennis McCann,
Killed by illegal alien driver 

But the ever-politically correct Mr. Hilkevitch and his Chicago Tribune bosses don't bother to ask why.

With half a million illegal aliens in the state and most in "sanctuary city," Chicago, it would be a fair speculation that they are the cause of the wildly above average rate of fatal hit-and-runs here.

The average sentient citizen is eminently cognizant of the victimization of the populace by illegal alien drivers, but of course, the Tribune wouldn't dare systematically look into the phenomenon for fear of what it might find.

But there is no shortage of salient examples.

For example:

--- Chicago Police Officer Michael Gordon lost his life in August 2004 to an illegal alien drunk driver. Officer Gordon was in the driver's seat of his squad car when it was struck by Luis Calle, a Guatemalan, whose blood alcohol level was 0.177, twice the legal limit.

--- Just this past June 10, William "Dennis" McCann, 66, a long-time Chicago insurance agent and graduate of Mendel High School was run down and killed in Logan Square by Saul Chavez, an illegal alien driving without a license and having 4x the legally allowable blood alcohol level.

In fact there is an entire on-line memorial to the American victims of illegal alien criminals -- many of the Americans having been killed by hit-and-run illegal alien drivers.

Everybody knows this is going on. But the Chicago Tribune won't even ask why illegal alien "sanctuary city" Chicago ranks so astronomically high in hit-and-run fatalities for pedestrians.

In its monumental lack of curiosity, the Tribune is engaged in a de facto coverup. In this its editors are nothing less than criminal abettors -- pimps, if you will.

Traditional Bavarian Lederhosen, Dirndl Becoming Hip in Germany

Traditional lederhosen and dirndl
are becoming hip in Germany

Several years back I was at a thrift store on Western Avenue and on the rack amidst the second hand Brooks Brothers and Jos. A. Banks mens' suits, I spied a lone lodenjanker.

That's a traditional country sport jacket indigenous to Bavaria and the other Southern regions of Germany and the odds of that showing up in a Chicago thrift store are something like 1 in a million. I'm sure my ancestors wore them, but I'm sure no one in my line has worn one in well over 100 years.

lodenjanker

It fit me and I was tempted to buy it. But then better sense prevailed. When, after all, would I actually wear the damned thing? Maybe once a year at Maifest Chicago or possibly at an occasional Dank Haus stammtisch.

And I would feel like a damned fool being seen in it on the streets of Chicago going to and from those events.

Well, it seems I might have passed up a great bargain, because now, word comes from Der Spiegel that traditional Bavarian couture is becoming the hottest thing in Germany today -- not just in Bavaria but everywhere.

Helene Fischer and Florian Silbereisen
in dirndl and lederhosen

Sort of like as in Huey Lewis' 1985 song, "It's hip to be square", it's apparently becoming so hip to don lederhosen or a dirndl in many parts of Germany - at least for parties and special events - that manufacturers of the traditional apparel can't keep pace with demand and prices are soaring.

Helene Fischer, Francine Jordi and Andrea Berg among many other schlager songstresses have been photographed wearing dirndl, to very good effect.

I should have bought that lodenjanker when I had the chance.

(Reprinted from the Chicago Schlager Music Review, with permission)

Marxist Styled Indoctrination at Lemont Middle School

Lemont's Old Quarry Middle School

Posted below are the 2010 salaries for the administrators and teachers in the Lemont-Bromberek school district 113A.

The district operates Oakwood and River Valley schools and Old Quarry Middle School.

This district comes to our attention because, if the allegations made on WIND radio Sunday are true, its Old Quarry Middle school has been engaging in a vile form of leftist political indoctrination more reminiscent of a Soviet Lenninist education camp than a suburban Chicago Lemont school.

On Sunday's Champion News show, sponsored by Jack Roeser's Family Taxpayers Foundation, the guests were three kids who had independently formed a Junior Tea Party organization in Lemont.

One of them, an emigre from the former Lithuanian Soviet Socialist Republic, reported that he was sent to the Old Quarry school's principal's office by a female social studies teacher there for the high crime of saying that he was a conservative who did not care for Obama and his ilk.

Apparently, in the view of the leftist ideologue, who is paid quite handsomely to teach at Old Quarry, this constituted a thought crime of such magnitude as to require disciplinary force.

Stories of left-wing indoctrination on college campuses are legion. The Philadelphia-based Foundation for Individual Rights in Education (FIRE)files thousands of lawsuits annually against colleges and universities that engage in this manner of Orwellian thought control.

FIRE's civil rights lawyers almost always win.

But now it appears that the thought police have spread their tenacles down to even the middle school level

Maybe FIRE should take a look at the allegations of blatant civil rights violations at Lemont's Old Quarry Middle School.

Here, from the database of the Family Taxpayers Foundation, is what the taxpayers of Lemont and its environs are shelling out for left-wing teachers to bully and brainwash their kids:

Teacher Salary Database

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lemont-Bromberek CSD 113A 2010 - Download data
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NAME SALARY
Anderson, Cathleen $66,782
Anderson, Michelle $67,785
Antonoff, Susan $67,428
Balaty, Christine $60,229
Baptist, Judith $57,457
Beckwith, Robert $112,739

Skokie's Favorite Hitler Fan: Mohandas K. Gandhi

Skokie's Statue To Hitler Fan
M.K. Gandhi

On October 2, 2004, with much fanfare and an obvious eye toward the burgeoning Indian vote in his village, Skokie Mayor George Van Dusen unveiled Illinois' first statue of Mohandas Gandhi.
The 8 ft. tall bronze statue stands in Skokie's sculpture park/bike path near Dempster and McCormick a mere 2 miles down the road from the Illinois Holocaust Museum.

The marble base upon which the statue sets contains an accolade to the Indian ascetic, which reads, "Apostle of Non-violence, Love, Truth and Justice." It also contains four quotations from the Indian nationalist leader -- all lofty appeals to truth, justice, righteousness, yada, yada, yada.

Oddly it omitted this utterance that the Mahatma issued in the Indian Newspaper, Harijan on April 22nd, 1940 -- the day that France formally surrendered to the armies of Adolf Hitler:

"Germans of future generations will honour Herr Hitler as a genius, as a brave man, a matchless organizer and much more."

Let me repeat. That glowing endorsement of Adolf Hitler, the murderer of 6 million Jews and 4 million others was written by Mahatma Gandhi.

I stumbled onto that little gem on page 190 of award-winning historian, John Lukacs' 1990 work, The Duel: 10 May-31 July 1940 - The Eighty Day Struggle Between Churchill and Hitler.

As I recall, members of Skokie Mayor Van Dusen's Democrat party howled when it was revealed that California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger's father had been a member of Hitler's National Socialist Party.

Gandhi Fan
Van Dusen

And they actually sought to shoot down the nomination of a Reagan appointee to a Treasury Department post when it was revealed that as a 10 year old boy he had been enlisted in the Hitler Youth -- the equivalent of the Boy Scouts. In fact, Van Dusen was a top aide then to one of the very liberal Congressmen, Sidney Yates, who was making those noises.

But neither of those ever even came near the outright endorsement of Adolf Hitler that was penned by the supposed Indian holy man.

Odd, the selectivity of the outrage of these doctrinaire left-wing pols, isn't it?

English Global-Warming Student Mauled, Eaten By Bear

British Global-Warming Student Horatio Chapple:
Eaten By Polar Bear

Sooner or later we're all going to have to contemplate our inevitable date with the grim reaper.

Given the few short decades given us to walk this vale of tears, one can hope that when the time comes, it will be peaceful -- perhaps painless -- maybe even meaningful --- but certainly not ridiculous.

That has unfortunately become the sad plight of an ever-increasing number of ideologues of the left, so drunk on their own snake oil as to become a cause for horse laughs on the occasion of their passing.

My all-time favorite in this category was the immortal health food crackpot, Jerome Rodale. He was felled by a gripper (see Chicago Lampoon 4/22/10) before Dick Cavett's live studio audience, minutes after boasting that he would live to be 100 due to his interesting diet of wild nuts and tree bark.

And then there was the animal-loving Ms. Frances Frost, a self-described "environmental dancer" of Canmore, Canada.
After her pet dog was killed by a wild cougar on her property, she refused to allow hunters permission to seek out the blood-thirsty beast and shoot it.

Weeks later, Ms. Frost danced her last eco-friendly tango, as the self-same kitty cat stalked, mauled and killed her.

But now comes sad news from Northern Europe of the nature-loving student who was eaten by a bear while on a school field trip to study "man-made global warming."

It seems that, caught up in a frenzy of excitement over the global warming flapdoodle, a group of 5 British students went off to the isolated Norwegian isle of Spitsbergen to conduct their own studies (replete, no doubt, with falsified data and faked e-mails.)

While communing with nature there, these nature-worshipping Brits ran into a bear. He did not take kindly to nature lovers invading his natural habitat, so naturally, he attacked them.

Hungry  Norwegian

Four of the young scholars narrowly escaped with their lives, but one, Horatio Chapple, 17, was killed. When his remains were recovered, it seems that the bear had decided that young Master Chapple would make the perfect filling lunch for a cold Nordic day.

So now, young Chapple has entered the never-ending cycle of nature by way of the bear's digestive system. On the bright side, however, at least his carbon footprint  has been reduced to a very sustainable, zero.

I'd be willing to bet a steak dinner at Chicago's famed Gibson's Steakhouse that these five British lads were devoted, holier-than-thou vegetarians.

Too bad the bear wasn't.

WGN's Dean Richards Blasts Tribune's Anti-Palin Bias

WGN's Dean Richards

If there were any lingering doubt as to the depths to which the Chicago Tribune has sunk in its bias against ideas and personalities conservative, it was put to rest this morning by the Tribune Corporation's own Dean Richards.

On his Sunday morning WGN radio arts show, Richards excoriated the Tribune editorial scribes for bastardizing his Sunday Tribune Arts column with an overtly misleading and what he termed "mean spirited" anti-Palin headline.

Richards conducted an interview with four time Oscar nominee, Julianne Moore. In the print interview, he questioned her on her role in the new comedy, "Crazy Stupid Love."

Julianne Moore

Four paragraphs later in the article, he questioned Moore regarding her portrayal of former vice-Presidential candidate, Sara Palin in the TV movie, "Game Change."

With this body of copy a Tribune headline writer came up with the headline for Dean's column, "Moore talks 'Crazy, Stupid, Love' and playing Sarah Palin."

On his radio broadcast, Richard's was uncharacteristically furious. "The headline completely misrepresented my article -- it was mean spirited and not the right thing to do," Richards said.

"You can see why people would say the Tribune is biased when they do things like that and some people will look only at the headline and think that Dean Richards is a biased cheap shot artist, " he said.

Richards said that he fired off an e-mail to Tribune editorial personnel asking for an explanation and asking for the name of the headline writer.

Sara Palin

He had not yet received an answer at the time of his Sunday morning broadcast.

"I am no fan of Sara Palin and people who know me know that, Dean Richards said. "But this was just not the right thing to do."

I'm eagerly waiting for the next liberal Tribune apologist to predictably summon up the ghost of Colonel McCormick and tell us that the Tribune editorially endorses lots of Republicans so it really is Chicago's right-wing paper.

Fact is the Chicago Tribune has become a dissembling left-wing rag. And now, even some of its few remaining intellectually honest employees are admitting as much.

"Progress Illinois" Blasts Durbin For Walmart Ties

Chicago's Lefties Still Hate Walmart

Progress Illinois, the voice of zany leftism in the state, reacted to yesterday's opening of the first Walmart in Chicago by reaffirming their call to boycott Walmart and blasting lefty U.S. Sen. Dick Durbin for his ties to the firm.

After long opposition from organized big-labor in Chicago, Walmart finally gained City Council approval to open here and it did so yesterday in the impoverished black Chatham neighborhood.

At a smaller than usual 10k sq. ft. "Walmart Express"  it will provide there, among many other things, discount groceries and fresh produce in an area long lamented by Chicago's libs as a "grocery desert."

And at the new store, Walmart gave jobs to 50 people selected from a pool of neighborhood applicants in high-unemployment Chatham.

Apparently that's not good enough for the loony lefties at Progress Illinois. On their website yesterday they restated their call for a consumer boycott of Walmart and even blasted their champion, Senator Dick Durbin for his ties to the evil corporate giant:

Likes Walmart's Campaign Cash

"Walmart has announced it is donating $20 million to charities and opening several dozen new stores in Chicago area; this is no surprise since records show repeated contact and donations from Walmart PAC to Sen Dick Durbin; Two of Durbins  (sic) former aides, are now lobbyists for the top Democratic powerhouse firm Podesta Group, which lobby's (sic) for Walmart."

Walmart just can't win with Chicago's lefties. If it gave away all of the contents of it's Chatham Walmart Express for free, Progress Illinois would blast them for "cultural insensitivity" for insulting Chatham's residents with handouts.

I wonder, will Dick Durbin move to make amends and mollify his pals over at Progress Illinois by returning all his campaign cash from Walmart?

Don't hold your breath waiting for that one.

Cook County Board May Free Illegal Aliens From County Jail Tomorrow

Tomorrow morning the Cook County Board will consider Commissioner Jesus Garcia's (D-Chi) bill to require the county jail to release illegal aliens being held for Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) unless they have been convicted of a felony or two misdemeanors.

Currently Cook County jail remands 6 illegal aliens a day over to ICE.

This is the latest in the effort of Chicago multiculturalists and open borders enthusiasts to nullify American immigration laws locally.

Latino-centric pol, Garcia

This comes on top of Cook County Sheriff, Tom Dart's July 11th announcement that he was unilaterally looking into legal ways that his office could cease co-operation with ICE.

According to WBEZ radio, if Dart suspends enforcement of immigration laws or if Garcia's bill should pass, it would make Cook County the largest local government entity in the nation to be in non-compliance with US law.

And Garcia's new bill also comes on top of Cook County State's Attorney, Anita Alverez' March 25th decision to evict ICE from the Cook County Court Building, where it had been assessing the immigration status of arrestees and putting a "hold order" on those found to be illegally here.

Sheriff Tom Dart: Cultural Marxist?

The elected Chicago pols who are opposed to enforcement of US immigration laws are undermining them in a manner that can only be described as "death by 1,000 cuts."

Tomorrow morning, the Cook County Board of Commissioners, should it pass Jesus Garcia's de facto local amnesty, could deliver the local coup de grace to our duly constituted immigration laws.

Oh, by the way. The last person to be put on hold for deportation before Alvarez kicked ICE out of the courthouse was one Marek Tomaszewska.

He was arrested for attempted murder for beating his ex-girlfriend into an inch of her life. He pushed her to the ground and repeatedly kicked her in the face. He had a previous battery conviction in this country. He is eligible for deportation and is being held at the Cook County jail.

He could be the last deportee from Chicago.

NEWS UPDATE 11/27/11 -- At 11th hour during the Wednesday morning Cook County Board meeting, Mr. Garcia announced that he was withdrawing the bill from consideration in order to "rethink it." Apparently this San Francisco-styled amnesty plan was a trifle too zany for even the Cook County Board of Commissioners.

Reagan's Cold War Victory Complete: American Culture Prevails At Eurovision 2011

Reagan Led US to Victory
Over the Soviet Union

This December 26th, it will be a full 20 years since Ronald Reagan led the US to complete victory over the Soviet "Evil Empire." 

To look at the recent 2011 Eurovision Song Competition, our victory is every bit as thorough as that of Rome over Carthage.

The winning entry in that iconic pan-European competition was a duo from the former Soviet state of Azerbaijan who sang a completely American-styled pop song in almost perfect Midwestern American English.

The Euro song winners were a couple calling themselves ELL/Nikki. They prevailed with a song called, "Running Scared," (not Roy Orbison's classic American rock version.)

Their vocal offering would seamlessly fit into the playlist of any contemporary pop radio station, anywhere in America.

ELL/Nikki: 2011 Eurovision Victors
From Former Soviet Azerbaijan


Following is a video of the performance which won the May 14th competition among 25 European nations in Dusseldorf, Germany for best European song.

It's sung in English -- American English.

Foreigners may heap criticism on the US -- but it is obviously a cloak for their deep seated envy of America.

The current dumbo-eared occupant of the White House may run around the world apologizing for America's greatness and power, and of course, he just doesn't get it.

They all really still want to be like us. Here's the winner for Best European Song of 2011:

Voucher Opponent Emanuel To Send Kids To Elite Private School

Zachariah, Ilana and Leah Emanuel
will be insulated from Chicago's crappy schools

Our Liberal Democrat Mayor Rahm Emanuel became more than a little testy when asked by NBC's Mary Ann Ahern as to whether he was sending his children to the gold-plated, private University of Chicago Lab School.

"What I do as a father is separate from what I do as a public official," he whinnied.

In other words, as a father, Rahm Emanuel thinks that the Chicago public schools stink. But as a public official, in debt to the powerful teachers unions, he thinks they're just fine.

He chose private schools for his kids.

He says everybody else should have no choice but to suffer the hideous Chicago Public schools.

You see Emanuel opposes voucher school choice systems that would enable parents to use their school tax monies to send their kids to good private schools like his kids. He opposes school choice because the teachers unions do. Education big-labor could never abide vouchers, because the rotten schools they operate would be out of business in very short order.

Emanuel is hardly the first liberal hypocrite to hide his kids away at Ritzy, safe, competent private schools while singing the praises of public education for the plebians.

Public school boosters, Barack Obama, Al Gore, Jesse Jackson, the Kennedys and 40% of Chicago Public school teachers send their own kids to good private schools.

If you live in Chicago and desire a decent education for your kids, you do however have a choice. Just bring money -- lots of it:

University of Chicago Lab School

University of Chicago Lab School
Schedule of Tuition 2011-2012 School Year

Grade -- Yearly Tuition 

Nursery School (Half Day)
$14,814                       
Nursery/Kindergarten(Full Day)
$21,060                         
Grades 1 - 4
$21,876                       
Grades 5 - 8
$23,676                    
Grades 9 - 12
$24,870                      

Summer Music 1966: Banned in Chicago

Pope Paul VI lauds Cardinal Cody
for banning Lou Christie's 1966 summer hit

It's just too hot to even think about Chicago politics. So it's a perfect time for our annual Chicago Lampoon summer song fest.

This year I'll include one that was banned from the Chicago airwaves.

When I posted my favorite summer songs last year, I didn't realize that 2 were from the summer of 1966. Frank Sinatra's "Summer Wind," hit #1 that year and the Lovin' Spoonful's "Summer in the City" hit was the #4 top seller of 1966.

Since we'll almost certainly have another thunderstorm tonight,  for good measure, this year, I thought I'd throw in another favorite from the summer of '66, Lou Christie's Rhapsody in the Rain which reached #16.

It would have done a lot better on the charts, but the Catholic Cardinal of Chicago in 1966, John Cardinal Cody, had it banned from airplay on WLS and WCFL -- the two major pop stations at the time, in the nation's 2nd largest market.

Seems the Cardinal thought that the rhythmic windshield wipers while "makin' out in the rain" and "makin' love in the storm," were just a little too morally corrosive for our young souls.

Anyway here are the summer sounds of 1966.

Maybe they'll help mitigate the Chicago's 99 degree, July 20, 2011 heat a little bit:

Frank Sinatra's #1 1966 hit, The Summer Wind:



The Lovin' Spoonful's #4 1966 hit, Summer in the City:



And Lou Christie's banned, morally corrosive #16 1966 hit, Rhapsody in the Rain:

Illinois Government Workers in Fat City: IPI Report

Gulag-era Kolymian miners

Ever since I began posting complete lists of public school teachers' salaries, I've been getting scores of irate letters from teachers or their union shills.

They have become so tiresome in their predictability.

After characterizing the work of a school marm as being something more grueling than that of the a Gulag-era Kolymian gold miner, they then say that teachers deserve a "living wage" or "a decent salary."

The last one who wrote this, just today, worked at Skokie's Niles West High School where a $230k gym teacher is the highest paid gym teacher in the state, if not the nation. Salaries at her public school in modest Skokie are only surpassed by those in opulent Lake Forest.

And it's just not government school employees.

Today the Illinois Policy Institute released its exhaustive study on public sector v. private sector salaries in Illinois.

Would it surprise you to learn that government employees make lots more?

The Illinois Policy Institute report showed:

---Compensation per state government employee averaged $69,500, which is 23 percent more than the private sector worker average of $56,500. Much of the difference was in employer-paid benefits, which were more than 1.5 times that of private employees. State employees received 16 percent more in wages and salaries than private employees.

---Compensation per local government employee averaged $63,100, which is 12 percent more than the private sector worker average of $56,500. Much of the difference was in employer-paid benefits, which were more than 1.5 times that of private employees. Local government employees received 4 percent more in wages and salaries than private employees.

Take a look at this brief introductory video and then read the synopsis of the IPI study right here.

Then the next time a government worker starts bleating to you about his backbreaking conditions and need for a simple "living wage" ---

-- you'll know what to say.

Hot German Supersongstress Helene Fischer Shrieks Crappy Chick Songs in English

The Euro schlager music superstar Helene Fischer sounds so beautiful in her native German. And to say she is easy on the eyes is a monumental understatement.

But when she chooses English language songs to cover, it seems she has developed a career death wish. Lately, her choices seem to have been just simply godawful.

Eric Carmen was the bane of American men and boys during the 1970s, churning out some of the most maudlin, schlocky, syrupy, downright crappy chick music of all time.

And lo and behold, the gorgeous Helen Fischer decides to cover one of his tunes -- what is possibly in the top 10 list of all-time worst American pop songs -- All By Myself.

Helene Fischer's Musical Advisers

As we used to say on the grammar school playground, while sticking a finger in our mouths for dramatic effect: Barf!! Puke!!

And then apparently, the sadly ill-educated Fraulein (she only ever studied singing, dancing and acting) decided she wants to show her "social conscience" by covering the shrieky, trite "What about us? -- Earth Song" -- popularized by no less a pea-brain than the late pederast, and monkey petter, Michael Jackson.

One begins to wonder who Helene Fischer's career advisers are -- Moe, Larry and Curly?

"Muskrat Love", by the Captain and Teneille, in a CNN poll and several other surveys has been voted by Americans as the stupidest pop song of all time.

With the idiotic selections she's been making in English language songs, look for Helene Fischer to be covering that little gem any day now.

Here is the execrable 1976 Eric Carmen hit, All By Myself:



And here, Fischer dresses up like the LA perve himself, while belting out the asinine, What About Us? (Michael Jackson's Earth Song)

(If you have dogs with sensitive hearing, you may want to let them out in the yard right now as she does some very serious shrieking and howling in this one.)



Give me Helene Fischer's German schlager tunes from a few years back, but please spare me her recent idiotic American pop music selections. The girl needs some serious career counseling. Isn't that supposed boyfriend of hers, Florian Silbereisen, man enough, to slap some sense into her?

(This was reprinted, by permission, from the Chicago Schlager Music Review.)

Rap(e) Fans Prevail Over Feminists, Gays, Whites At Pitchfork Fest

Odd Future: Anti-white, Anti-women, Anti-gay

A major music festival in Chicago this weekend, is showcasing a black rap group, Odd Future, that overtly sings of murdering white girls, raping girls of any racial group, lesbians defecating in synogogues, and beating the hell out of homosexuals.

Oddly there's nary a peep out of Chicago's progessive liberals. In fact, several noted left-leaning groups are financially sponsoring the event.

The 5th annual Pitchfork Music festival is being held today thru July 17th at Union Park on Chicago's West side.

The appearance of the racist, misogynistic, homophobic group is made possible by the event's sponsors: Heineken Beer, Whole Foods Market, WBEZ Chicago Public Radio, The Chicago Reader,Puma, Urban Outfitters, Lifeway Kefir, Zipcar, Emusic, TimeOut Chicago, WXRT radio and several others.

Pitchfork event writer, Sean Fennessey, told the Tribune, "They (Odd Future) rap about raping women. Often."

Here are selected lyrics from the Odd Future rap offering, "Swag Me Out":

"Chillin in class with a bag full of grass
lookin' for a white chick to smoke up and choke up.
I even got that white sniff to come over here and take a whiff
Now you ready to get raped and ate by Mr. Haley?
Imma take your bitch back to my crib
...If you gotta problem bitch, hop on this dick

Nigga don't want you here

so get the fuck out fore I shoot you like a deer.
Two nazi dykes shittin' in a synogogue
Cuz that bitch licks balls from Western to Crenshaw
And her grandma suck dick down in Rimpau
And she masturbates with vaseline and a Ken doll."

Pitchfork spokesman, Ryan Schreiber said, "They are a band that we feel is creative and forward thinking musically."

You can see all of Odd Future's lyrics complete with ebonics translations right here.

Now it is a bit peculiar that the "progressives" in Evanston were a mere two months ago, howling over the sexist misogyny of a businessman who wanted to start an eatery featuring waitresses in sexy "Tilted Kilts."

They indignantly painted pictures of aroused patrons taking to the streets to molest school girls because of the inciteful attire there. They killed that proposal

But no complaints with this black rap group.

And the Chicago Tribune shudders at the thought of mentioning the race of the black mobsters attacking whites on the North side and gays in Boystown.

But no complaints with the overtly anti-white lyrics of this black rap group.

I'm sure that Heineken and Whole Foods and WBEZ Chicago Public Radio have corporate-sponsored seminars on the need for racial sensitivity and respect in the workplace.

But no problem sponsoring this black rap group.

The hypocrisy of the Chicago liberal-progressive establishment is breathtaking.

3 Armed Blacks Invade Home in Lake Forest: Fruits Of Obama Racial Profiling Law

If you've been thinking that maybe you could insulate your family from urban black crime by amassing a pile of money and moving to tony Lake Forest, think again.

The Lake Forest GazeboNews reported yesterday that a gang of three armed and masked black men are sought in connection with the invasion and armed robbery of an occupied home there, July 8th.

According to the report, the armed invaders bound a woman in duct tape and held her at gunpoint while they ransacked the house stealing jewelry and electronics.

The three suspects are still at large.

It's fortunate that Lake Forest's on-line newspaper hasn't the qualms of the censorious PC "reporters" at the Chicago Tribune who refuse to mention the race of offenders or suspects if they happen to be protected minorities.

The  Tribune's Mary Schmich and Dawn Turner Trice have editorialized that reporting such racial identification serves no useful purpose and makes minorities feel bad.

But this event does raise a matter of important public policy.

It is entirely possible that black criminals are now feeling emboldened to prey upon victims in predominately white suburbs due to the 2004 Illinois racial profiling law.

The bill was proposed by Illinois State Senator Barack Obama in 2000 at the urging of the ACLU.

When in the past, suburban police departments such as Lake Forest's would have found some rationale for stopping suspicious looking blacks cruising an affluent neighborhood, today they can't.

In fact, liberal Highland Park, (just South of Lake Forest) hired an independent investigator to monitor all stops of racial minorities there.

No doubt, that has had a chilling effect on police surveillance of prospective criminals there and, as of 2004, throughout the state of Illinois.

If you're a black burglar, robber or other miscreant just go up to Lake Forest, Highland Park or any other North Shore suburb and case the joints. And if you're stopped by the cops and questioned, yell "racial profiling."

And call Barack Obama's Justice Department.