Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Maifest Chicago 2013: Celebrating German Culture With the Jesse White Tumblers

The annual springtime celebration of Germanic culture in Chicago, Maifest 2013, will be observed this coming weekend on the North side.
Nothing says "German culture" like
watching Chicago ghetto youths do cartwheels

The German-American ethnic part of the program, which begins at noon on Sunday, will be highlighted by that iconic German-American group, (I am not making this up) The Jesse White Tumblers!

Now I don't know about you, but nothing says "German-American culture" to me more than watching a group of West-side Chicago African-American ghetto kids doing cartwheels and somersaults.

That is, with the possible exception of "5 Lesbians Eating A Quiche."

I bring that up, because the DANK Haus, which is one of the few remaining German-American outfits still left in Chicago, sponsored a theatrical endeavor of that name last year.
The Chicago DANK Haus sponsored
this thespian celebration of lesbian culture

Now what this thespian celebration of lesbian lifestyles has to do with German-American culture, quite escapes me.

Unless it is that the current administrator of the German-American DANK Haus Chicago, the curiously Polish surnamed, Nicholle Dombrowski, somehow reckons that girl-on-girl cunnilingus is as signal a German tradition as Tyrolean slap-dancing or Prussian goose-stepping.

Also, they will have music at Maifest Chicago 2013.

They are featuring a group from Germany named "Phenix." This is one of those dour, bleak, dark, surrealistic electro-pop German duets, the type of which Mike Myers used to lampoon on Saturday Night Live for being so dour, bleak, dark and humorlessly surreal.

Their big hit was a little number called, "I hate the 80s." Not quite "Weird Nun" of the Myers spoofs, but hardly something from "The Sound of Music".

Anyway Mayfest Chicago 2013 will be going on this weekend.

In 2009, the readers of Chicago's newspaper for dummies, the RedEye, voted it the best street festival in Chicago.

Consider the source there.

I can't imagine why Redeye readers would think that standing around on a dingy Chicago street, sipping a tepid $10 German beer from a plastic cup, listening to "Weird Nun" while watching the Jesse White Tumblers would be a German-flavored wild time.

Unless, perhaps, they were serving quiche.

(Now is the time on Sprockets when we dance):


  1. Quiche is the only thing out of place, it is French.

    The Jesse White Tumblers are displaying discipline. A trait strongly associated with Germans. Lesbians are also very disciplined. They do not stray like bisexual or drunk women. Colonel Klink would have loved lesbians on his staff at Stalag 13.

    Dombrowski .... now that is an interesting name. I live in a building in which the mortgage is held by Dombrowski Associates. Look him up, first name is Joseph.

    Ah, what the hell, here's the link:

    1. I just finished reading a very bad novel by some lesbian writer who teaches creative writing at the school of the Art Institute of Chicago and it was all about lesbians with cheatin' hearts.

      As for Col. Klink, Gen. Burkhalter's sister, who he was always trying to pawn off on Klink, probably was a (very ugly) lesbian.

      Hilda, the beautiful blond receptionist who Hogan was always kissing on the sly, definitely was not. She married Hogan (Bob Crane) in real life.

  2. I might have enjoyed a single $10 beer from a plastic cup had I known it was going on. My surname came to the country in the first half of the 1700s from Germany and settled in the area of western Pennsylvania. My sister was supposed to send me the geneology book that was done, I have not got it. Not even sure if I have another geneology report that that was written with me here - it might be packed away in my college stuff. My name is not prolific. My surname makes mostly girls. Hence there are few of us. I would like a child, but I do not have much time left for providing what is necessary of the quality necessary for it to be above average.

    1. Hey, If you'd like to rediscover just a bit of your German heritage, check out our sister website - the Chicago Schlager Music Review --

      And stay in touch with us there -- you might enjoy it!!!


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