Organic Foods Guru Dies on TV Before a Live Studio Audience.

In honor of the Earth Day commemerence, I want to relate the tale of Dr. Jerome Irving Rodale. He is generally considered one of the founders of the organic foods craze. He died of a massive gripper before a live studio audience after bragging that he would live to be 100 because of his healthy diet.

This is how it happened.

On June 5th, 1971, Dr. Rodale was a guest on the Dick Cavett Show. That was a nationwide late night talk show of the era, which due to Cavett's snooty Yale liberal demeanor, was favored by American liberals.

As Cavett relates it in his autobigraphy, the modestly entitled Cavett (1974), the organic foods guru was a somewhat pompous, Leon Trotsky look-alike, who had devoted most of his life to the promotion of organic farming and organic food consumption.

As the first guest on the show, the 72 year old got down on the studio floor and began doing pushups to illustrate his diet-induced vigor.

He then boasted that he would likely live to be 100, unless run down in the streets by a sugar-crazed taxi driver.

When the second guest of the evening, a New York Post columnist made his entrance, Dr. Rodale moved downstage to the secondary chair in a way common to the TV talk show format.

A few minutes later he appeared to have dozed off in the chair and was snoring loudly. Cavett then asked, "Are we keeping you awake, Dr. Rodale?" Audience laughter ensued.

Then it became quite apparent that there was something quite wrong with the health-foods guru. Cavett couldn't stir him. Cavett says he resisted the instinct to announce, "Is there a doctor in the house?" due to its comic implications. A staffer then came out with an emergency oxygen tank which in 3 Stooges or Keystone Cops fashion was found to be lacking a key component.

By this time some women in the audience began openly sobbing. Finally, paramedics arrived and the Health Foods kingpin was pronounced dead on arrival at the hospital of a massive heart failure. He was 72, about the average age for an American man of his time.

The show was being videotaped and as such was never aired by ABC.

Today there is a non-profit organization, the Rodale Institute, which promotes organic farming and organic foods and has an entire section on its website devoted to the hokum of Global Warming.

I have little doubt that the Rodale crowd are among the biggest enthusiasts of government action to regulate the foods that we eat and forcibly restrict the product choices that we can be allowed to make.

They know what's best for us.

If we take their advice and adhere to their dictactes, we will all live happier, healthier and longer lives.

Just like their great leader, Dr. Rodale.

The only man in the history of American television to croak before a live studio audience.

Cubs Tickets Priciest in MLB

It's opening day at Wrigley Field. And despite the Cubs 101 year World Series Championship drought, it will now cost you more to see this year's motley assemblage in blue perform than any other team in major league baseball.

According to the Wilmette-based Team Marketing Report, the Cubs have now overtaken the Boston Red Sox with an average ticket price of $52.56. That means "a day of fun at the old ball park" as Jack Brickhouse used to blurt, will now cost a family of four $329.74, when you add in parking and all of the other associated costs.

The Cubs were second in the majors with a 10.1% price increase for 2010.

Thank you, Ricketts family.

But as the Cubs limp into Wrigley today with a 2-3 record, hitters that can't hit in the clutch and a bullpen creakier than the boards on the deck of the Mayflower, they will be sold out this afternoon.

You see, the Cubs now are chic.

But it wasn't always that way.

Back in the mid-60s, the old owner, P.K Wrigley, couldn't give away Cubs tickets.

On a bone-chilling opening day in '67 or '68, one of my avid Cub fan childhood friends ditched grammar school to attend along with about 1,014 other stalwarts (or lunatics depending on your perspective.)

P.K. was so grateful that he gave them each a certificate for free admission to another game. I wonder what the 2nd place prize winners got -- 2 tickets?

Back in 1964, the year the Cubs traded away future Hall of Famer Lou Brock for a sore-armed pitcher, Ernie Broglio, to save money ladies used to get in for free every Wednesday.

I'm sure that P.K.'s marketing geniuses thought this would turn Wrigley Field into a chick magnet. In reality it gave suburban mothers an excuse to pack the station wagon with the neighborhood kids and bring them to a game. The moms would get in for free and the kids would set them back a quarter a piece.

My mom did that with me and my neighborhood baseball card trading pals on several occasions.

According to an old scorecard that I have (I was lucky enough to get it autographed by future Hall of Famer, Juan Marichal) that year an Oscar Mayer hot dog cost 30 cents and a Budweiser bottle 40 cents.

Bleacher admission was 50 cents.

That was, of course, before the great liberal Democrat, Lyndon Baines Johnson, inflated the US currency to pay for his wildly successful wars: his war in Vietnam and domestic war on poverty.

In 1981, Cubs Manager, Lee Elia went into his famous on-tape, career ending, obscenity-laden rant when he said that most of the city of Chicago worked for a living and the rest came out to Wrigley to boo his ballclub.

Despite a nation-leading 11.9% unemployment rate you won't see the unemployed represented at Wrigley today.

It's just too bloody expensive.

Chicago Lampoon Hits the Mississippi Airwaves

This past Monday, the author of the Chicago Lampoon was a guest on the Paul Gallo talk show on the Supertalk Mississippi radio network.

The invitation was in response to the piece that appeared earlier this month in the Lampoon entitled: "Hey Garry Meier: Mississippi is Freer that Chicago."

The interview was heard on stations in Jackson, Hattiesburg, Brookhaven/Monticello/McComb, the Mississippi Delta, Oxford, Corinth, the Golden Triangle and in Elvis' birthplace, Tupelo.

I discussed the relative superiority of Mississippi over Chicago from a libertarian perspective and was particularly critical of Chicago's gun ban, smoking ban, red light camera surveillance and the lousy record its colleges have on student liberties.

You can listen to the interview by clicking HERE

Schakowsky: Immigrants Afraid of Census

Speaking on the morning WLS radio Don Wade and Roma Show, North side Congresswoman Jan Schakowsky (D-9th) said that Chicago's low rate of census form return was due to the fears of Chicago's massive population of recent immigrants.

Hear the entire interview here.

The rate of return of the mailed census forms was a paltry 38% in the Chicago area compared to a nationwide average of 52%.

Schakowsky said that this was because immigrants are poor and begin to "double up" with several families living in a single apartment. "They may be afraid to say how many people are living in certain spaces," she said.

Wait a minute. Is Schakowsky saying that immigrants, many of them illegal, are overcrowding apartments and homes in violation of various municipal codes of occupancy, health codes and fire codes?

Immigration control activists have been arguing for more than a decade that this overcrowding is commonplace among immigrants. They argue that it is unsafe, unhealthy and poses an unfair burden on other renters who have to share common spaces with people who are not paying there fair share. They also argue that it is unfair to taxpayers who pay to educate the large numbers of children brought into their neighborhood schools after being illegally crammed into these dwellings.

In fact, in September of 2006, there was a fatal fire in Schakowsky's own district where 6 illegal alien children died. They were among 13 illegal aliens who lived in a cramped East Rogers Park apartment.

And this past February 14th, 7 people, including a newborn died in a fire which swept thru a Cicero apartment that was packed with multiple families.

Yet when Cicero authorities had tried to enforce the codes of occupancy that would have stopped such overcrowding, Schakowsky and her friends in the Illinois Coalition for Immigrant Rights - Chicago's main illegal alien lobby group - called the enforcement racist. It discriminated against Latino immigrants, they said, and in '97,they prompted the Clinton Justice Department to force Cicero to desist.

And when Waukegan authorities objected to packing multiple families and unrelated persons into apartments and homes, Schakowsky and her illegal alien lobbyist friends got the Clinton Justice Department in '97 to force them to desist too.

And now Schakowsky is explaining to us that immigrants aren't answering the census questionnaire because they may be packing multiple families into small apartments and don't want to get caught by authorities who she and her allies have not yet browbeaten into non-enforcement of their occupancy and fire codes.

What a web these leftist do-gooders and uplifters weave.

Hey Garry Meier: Ole Miss is Freer Than Chicago

I genuinely like WGN radio's Garry Meier. I think he is one of only two genuinely funny jocks on the Chicago airwaves and I genuinely hope he blows away his backstabbing ex-partner, Roe Conn, in the arbitron ratings.

But last week Meier made the mistake of trying to make a serious observation and he showed his obvious 60's timewarp in the process.

He tried to do a bit on the inanity of some obscure North Mississippi High School, which cancelled its prom so as to not allow an overt lesbian couple to attend.

He then concluded that Mississippi was a repressive place and he was sure glad he lived in much freer Chicago.

Think again Garry. This isn't 1964 and Sheriff Clarke is long dead. Chicago today is vastly more repressive than that old bastion of the Confederacy.

Old black men in Mississippi are free to exercise their constitutionally guaranteed right to defend their homes and families with firearms. Not so in King Daley's fiefdom, where an elderly black man named MacDonald had to appeal to the U.S. Supreme Court to secure that civil right in the face of Chicago's onerous and unconstitutional violation of his 2nd Amendment rights.

The free adults of Mississippi are free to partake of legal adult tobacco products when they sip beer in a pub or play blackjack in one of the Gulf Coast casinos.

And in the enlightened libertarian utopia of Lucedale, MS, they can smoke anywhere they wish -- even in workplaces.

Not so in the Chicago nanny state where adults must hunker down in the cold 15 feet from the entrance of a tavern in order to enjoy a puff on a cigarette. They can't even smoke on Chicago's windswept beaches for Chrissakes!

Mississippi citizens can face their accusers when alleged to have run a red light. They have no autamotonic revenue generating red light machines there as those that torment Daley's serfs.

And while the actions of an obscure Mississippi High School may seem petty and onerous to the libertarian minded, they pale in comparison to the outright neo-fascism of the speech codes at all of the major universities in the Chicago area.

Northwestern, De Paul, UIC and the University of Chicago are all on the red light watch list of the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education, a potent civil rights advocacy group, for their outrageously unconsitutional "Speech Codes."

These purportedly "liberal" Chicago institutions have conspired to violate their adult students' civil right to free speech for decades now. The University of Chicago even went so far as to attempt to discipline an adult student for his private Facebook postings. The UC book burners had to back down when threated by a FIRE lawsuit, but the petty, pusillanimous academic bugaboo chasers there remained unrepenetant.

As I mentioned, the notorious Mississippi Sheriff Clarke of the civil rights era is long gone. His police state tactics have been resurrected however by people with names like Burge and Abbate. And they are from enlightened Northern Chicago, not Mississippi.

So please stick to your funny bits, Garry and don't lecture us on how relatively free Chicago is. It is a civil rights backwash by comparison to Mississippi.

I briefly dated a fetching belle from the Mississippi Delta and a friend dated a total knockout who had been Miss "Ole Miss."

We both can attest that the girls are freer there too.

U of Chicago Thought Police Threaten Pro-Israel Student

For the second time in two years, the University of Chicago has threatened a student with disciplinary action over comments posted on the student's personal Facebook page.

This time, they launched a police investigation into controversial Pro-Israeli tongue-in-cheek comments posted by an undergraduate campus radio host.

This time the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education (FIRE), a civil rights advocacy group, may take legal action against the UC (which formerly employed both Mr. and Mrs. Barack Obama.)

Here is the report from the FIRE website:



University of Chicago Repeatedly Censors Student Facebook Posts:

Joke about 'Israel Lobby' Author's Assassination Leads to Police Investigation


CHICAGO, March 24, 2010—For the second time in two years, the University of Chicago has censored a student's post on a private Facebook page. Undergraduate Joseph "Tex" Dozier posted a joke that he had had a dream about assassinating University of Chicago professor John Mearsheimer "for a secret Israeli organization." Mearsheimer is co-author of the controversial book The Israel Lobby and U.S. Foreign Policy. This post prompted an investigator from the university's police department to question Dozier about his political views, suggest that he would investigate Dozier's comments on his university radio show, and demand that Dozier remove the post or else have the post reported to Mearsheimer, one of his professors. Dozier came to the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education (FIRE) for help.

"Any reasonable person would recognize that Dozier's post was unquestionably a joke," said FIRE Vice President Robert Shibley. "If Dozier worked for a secret Israeli organization, would he have announced it via Facebook? And if the University of Chicago truly believed that Dozier presented a threat to a professor's life, how would merely censoring the student have solved the problem? The U of C is making a joke of itself by policing and censoring student comments on Facebook."

On December 6, 2009, Dozier wrote on his personal Facebook page, "Dreamt that I assassinated [University of Chicago professor] John Mearsheimer for a secret Israeli organization - there was a hidden closet w/ Nazi paraphanelia [sic]. Haha! :-)" Mearsheimer is popularly known for his 2007 book The Israel Lobby and U.S. Foreign Policy with co-author Stephen Walt. According to the authors, the book "focuses primarily on the lobby's influence on U.S. foreign policy and its negative effect on American interests."

University of Chicago Police Department (UCPD) officer Abraham Martinez phoned Dozier on December 7. According to Dozier, Martinez called the post a "death threat" and asked if Dozier disagreed with Mearsheimer politically. Martinez also asked if he had made "controversial comments" about Mearsheimer in the past that the UCPD should be aware of.

Martinez even told Dozier that he had "researched" Dozier and his weekly radio show The Boiling Point, which is broadcast on university-hosted station WHPK. When Martinez said that he was required to contact Mearsheimer to inform him of Dozier's comment, Dozier replied that Mearsheimer had been one of his professors and that he feared negative repercussions if his innocent comment was reported to Mearsheimer. Martinez responded that if Dozier deleted the comment within 30 minutes, Martinez would include the removal in his official report and not contact Mearsheimer. Dozier negotiated a two-hour window and then deleted his comment.

Neither the University of Chicago nor the UCPD has challenged FIRE's or Dozier's account of this conversation.

FIRE wrote University of Chicago President Robert J. Zimmer on March 2 about the violation of Dozier's expression rights. While the University of Chicago is a private institution not bound by the First Amendment, it explicitly promises students freedom of speech in its Student Manual, which also states that "The ideas of different members of the University community will frequently conflict and we do not attempt to shield people from ideas that they may find unwelcome, disagreeable, or even offensive. Nor, as a general rule, does the University intervene to enforce social standards of civility." The university has not responded.

This is the second time the University of Chicago has censored a student's Facebook post in violation of the university's promises to its students. In 2009, undergraduate Andrew Thompson posted a photograph album on his personal Facebook page under the title, "[Name of ex-girlfriend] cheated on me, and you're next!" The photos were of various persons and were unremarkable, though some of Thompson's Facebook "friends" posted negative statements about the ex-girlfriend.

The next day, after the ex-girlfriend complained, Susan Art, Dean of Students in the College, demanded that Thompson "remove her name and remove the pictures you have posted of her" because of an alleged Student Manual prohibition against "disrespectful" speech.

"Can you let me know when her name and her pictures are removed from your [F]acebook page?" Art wrote. "I expect this to happen right away." Fearing university punishment, Thompson complied with Art's censorship demands, but turned to FIRE for help.

FIRE wrote President Zimmer on February 23, 2009, but the university eventually replied that since FIRE was not threatening litigation, the University of Chicago did not want to engage in any further discussion regarding the issue.

"The University of Chicago had a chance to reverse course last year and start respecting students' free speech rights, but it has continued to monitor students' off-campus Internet speech and censor innocuous comments," said Adam Kissel, Director of FIRE's Individual Rights Defense Program. "The university has failed to fulfill its own promises once again."

FIRE is a nonprofit educational foundation that unites civil rights and civil liberties leaders, scholars, journalists, and public intellectuals from across the political and ideological spectrum on behalf of individual rights, due process, freedom of expression, academic freedom, and rights of conscience at our nation's colleges and universities. FIRE's efforts to preserve liberty on campuses across America can be viewed at www.thefire.org.





Tell the University of Chicago to respect student rights. Send a letter to President Zimmer here.

Devoted Cub Fans Keep Pledge

In 1953 a loyal Pittsburgh Pirates fan from Dubois, PA, vowed that he would not shave until the Pirates won a pennant.

True to his word, he let his whiskers grow, unabated, until the Pirates finally clinched the NL crown in 1960.

The Cubs finished 35 games behind the Pirates that year with a meager 60-94 record.

Figuring that some of the Pirates good luck might rub off, a group of North Siders vowed back then that they too would refuse to shave until their beloved Cubbies won the NL flag.

With the unseasonably warm weather this April 1st, the loyal group (pictured above) gathered today outside the Museum of Science and Industry downtown to discuss the Cubs prospects for 2010.

Daddy's Little Girl Anointed For Dem Lt. Gov Slot

With today's news that Accidental Governor, Pat Quinn, has anointed former Sen. Paul Simon's daughter, Sheila, to be his running mate, I began to ponder the plethora of Democrat political dynasties in Illinois.

The Democrats in the state and Chicago in particular seem to have more political dynasties than medieval China or pre-1914 monarchic Europe.

First Mayor Richard J. Daley begat Mayor Richie Daley and Cook County Commissioner John Daley.

And Cook County Bd. President John Stroger begat Cook County Bd. President Todd Stroger.

Illinois House Speaker Mike Madigan begat Illlinois Attorney General Lisa Madigan and Chicago Congressman Bill Lipinski begat Chicago Congressman Dan Lipinski.

And of course Jesse Jackson Sr. begat Chicago Congressman Jesse Jackson Jr. who married Chicago Alderman Sandi Jackson.

And Cook County Assessor Parky Cullerton begat State Senator John Cullerton.

And powerhouse Chicago Alderman, Dick Mell begat State Rep. Debra Mell and former IL First Lady Patti Mell Blagojevich.

And Illinois Senate President Tom Hynes begat Illinois State Comptroller Dan Hynes.

Try as I might, I could think of no such phenomenon on the Republican side hereabouts.

Wonder why that is?

Now we might have yet a second Daddy's little girl holding a statewide constitutional office.

But hey, this is Chicago.

It's all in the family.

Combat Child Obesity With "Start Smoking Clinics"

Led by First Lady, Michelle Obama, the uplifters have of late uncovered a new Cause: child obesity.

The yawping bugaboo chasers have been shedding oceans of crocodile tears over the fact that American children are too fat. And they come forth now with enlightened schemes for substituting celery and broccoli for nachos in America's school cafeterias.

Anyone who has ever been in a school cafeteria knows that it is only a matter of days before the little savages will begin hurling celery stalks and broccoli buds at each other. The phenomena will probably reach such a crisis point as to inspire the zero tolerance scholastic pecksniffs to define vegetable abuse as a hate crime and cart the miscreants off to the local hoosegow.

The solution to the child obesity problem is so patently obvious that I thought it would be apparent to even a Congressman.

We simply have to encourage child tobacco consumption.

Since the American Indians first turned on Sir Walter Raleigh, tobacco has been universally recognized as an appetite inhibitant. At least 80% of adults who quit smoking suffer significant weight gain.

I addition, tobacco consumption has been measured to enhance alertness, relieve stress and ease the digestive processes.

Think of the benefits to the legions of listless Attention Deficit Disorder sufferers and the savings in psychotropic drug costs.

We must not only allow our children to smoke, but must take the steps necessary to encourage responsible tobacco use.

Accordingly, I am announcing my new scheme to open a network of "Franklin D. Roosevelt Start Smoking Clinics."

I thought that in this new enlightened era of Social Democrat prominence, it would only be fitting to honor FDR in this way. The architect of the New Deal was seldom seen without a cigarette in his mouth. At his press conferences he used to joke about
his favorite Murad and Camel cigarettes.

And so, at our clinics, we will teach the kids the proper way to light, inhale and extinguish their butts. I think we will start them out on Camel straights -- no use in starting out with halfway measures -- and if they feel like moving on later to more tasty Newports or more chic Virginia Slims, that's their business.

This is hardly a novel concept.

Well into the 1970s, the prestigious Loyola Academy in Wilmette, afforded its Seniors the luxury of their own smoking lounge.

It was a respected rite de passage and Loyola not only had among the highest SAT scores in the region, but one seldon saw any fat men there.

So I say, let's go ahead with the "FDR Start Smoking Clinics."

I have already had my grant writer contact the Phillip Morris Foundation for start up money. And I will be franchising out the idea.

FOR FRANCHISE INFORMATION, JUST DROP ME AN EMAIL.

The Ides of March: A Chicago Original

The Ides of March were a Chicago garage band from the mid sixties who made good -- sort of.

Back in the era when radio stations were owned locally, rather than by distant conglomerates, they became regional favorites performing at a number of the old "sock hop" styled venues in the city and suburbs. WCFL and WLS -- the 2 main pop stations at the time, began to play their discs and they went to the top of the Chicago charts with several of them.

But they never seemed to be able to get the same radio exposure in other parts of the country, until they broke thru with their 1970 hit, "Vehicle."

They still play the oldies circuit locally.

The "Ides of March," a Chicago original -- appropriate to be recalled and celebrated today.

Memo to Dick Durbin: Santo Knew How to Handle Bunning

With U.S. Senator and Hall of Fame Hurler, Jim Bunning today tieing up Illinois Senator Dick Durbin in parliamentary knots on the Senate floor, we can take solace in the knowlege that at least one Chicagoan knew how to handle the Kentuckian:

Cubs Beat Bunning on Santo's 3 Run Blast

June 23, 1969

Ron Santo’s 3-run blast powered the Cubs over Jim Bunning and the Pirates at Wrigley. Bill Hands went the distance to improve his record to 7-6.

Cubs 3, Pirates 2. W: Hands (7-6) L: Bunning (6-5)

Natalie Merchant on Chicago's Filthy Weather

They say that some Eskimo tribes have as many as two dozen different words to describe snow. Well, I think Chicagoans need every bit as vast a lexicon to describe grey skies. Today, February 27th with temperatures struggling to crack the freezing point the sky is grey from one end of the horizon to the other. Today it's a kind of crayola crayon silver grey punctuated by little billows of bituminous grey.

And to think we only have four months or so left of this depression-inducing, filthy Chicago weather. They don't call it the land of the endless winter for nothing.

Natalie Merchant grew up in upstate New York, but she might as well have been writing about Chicago in her 1988 hit with 10,000 maniacs, "Like the Weather."

It is, to my knowlege, the only hit song ever written about clinical depression. She was such a cheery little leftist vegetarian.

So here it is from a live performance: the perfect paean to Chicago's filthy weather.

Please note that by the time of this performance, Miss Merchant had begun to clean up her aging Catholic schoolgirl appearance and was said to have been washing her hair at least once a month -- whether she needed it or not.

The dance steps in this video were choreographed by the Elaine Benes School of Dance, of which Miss Merchant seems to have been a graduate, summa cum laude.

"The color of the sky
as far as I can see
Is coal grey..."

Preckwinkle is Obama Clone: Russ Stewart Analysis

By Russ Stewart

(Russ Stewart, a Chicago Attorney and political analyst for the NW Side Nadig Community newspapers, is a frequent guest on WLS radio's "Political Shootout.")

Platitudes do not necessarily presage performance. In 2008, Barack Obama ran as a “reformer” who would bring “change.” Instead, he has governed as a typical tax-and-spend liberal Democrat.

But the proper platitudes do, however, presage victory, especially in a Cook County Democratic primary where minorities and liberals predominate. As proven by Toni Preckwinkle’s sizeable Feb. 2 victory for Cook County Board president, such buzz-words as “independent,” “reformer,” and “competent” have great impact, particularly when the incumbent, Todd Stroger, is perceived as the incompetent tax-hiking non-reformer.

In analyzing the outcome, here’s a few appropriate journalistic platitudes:

* Everybody hates Todd. Stroger’s demise eclipses mere defeat or rejection, even surpasses embarrassment or humiliation, and approaches abasement and sheer mortification. The incumbent board president got 13.6 percent of the vote. That’s an astounding personal repudiation, based on voter anger and abject loathing.

Stroger won four of 50 Chicago wards, and got a mere 41.3 percent in his home 8th Ward. Overall, he took 17.1 percent of the Chicago vote, and just 8.6 percent of the suburban vote. As for his 78,532 voters, rumors abound that there are counselors available to provide trauma therapy, either for their remorse in backing him, or for their shock in being so stupid.

The Toddler’s misguided, misgoverned four-year reign is proof positive that there is no DNA gene for political astuteness. And further proof that, in 2010, tax-hikers are doomed.

* Preckwinkle is another Obama. Preckwinkle, a 19-year black Chicago alderman who rarely dissented from the council’s Daley majority, and has no governing experience, rode a tide of anti-tax, anti-Stroger sentiment, and won countywide with 50 percent. She amassed 281,905 votes, to Terry O’Brien’s 131,896 (23 percent), Dorothy Brown’s 83,150 (14.4 percent), and Stroger’s 78,532 (13.6 percent). Total turnout was 575,483

Derided by some as the “white liberal” candidate, and by others as the “Daley stealth” candidate, Preckwinkle, age 62, assembled an Obama-like coalition of blacks, Hispanics, and Lakefront and suburban white liberals, while running exceedingly well in white ethnic wards and townships.

According to official tallies, Preckwinkle won 34 of 50 wards, getting 47 percent of the Chicago ballots. She won 6 of 8 Hispanic-majority wards. She won 14 of 20 black-majority wards. She won all 6 Lakefront wards.

And she won 24 of 30 suburban townships, racking up 70 percent-plus in Barrington, Evanston, New Trier, Northfield and Oak Park townships. Preckwinkle also garnered over half the vote in white-majority Elk Grove, Hanover, Lyons, Maine, Niles, Palatine, Rich, River Forest, Riverside, Schaumburg and Wheeling townships.

In 2004, when Obama ran for the U.S. Senate, he got 301,199 votes (66.5 percent) in Chicago, and 163,718 (60.8 percent) in the suburbs. Obama ran exceedingly well in white liberal areas, and got 25-35 percent of the vote in white ethnic wards. The 2010 difference: Obama got near-unanimous black support, and Preckwinkle only 40 percent.

* Liberals love Toni. In Chicago’s Lakefront wards, which cast 43,187 votes, Preckwinkle got 29,944 votes (69.3 percent), to O’Brien’s 7,052 (16.3 percent) and Stroger’s 2,391 (5.5 percent). Preckwinkle also had huge margins in suburban liberal enclaves Evanston (77.9 percent) and Oak Park (73.8 percent).

* More blacks voted for the electable black than for the racially pandering black.
Stroger ran on the premise that the one-cent sales tax hike was “needed” to provide health services to minorities. That was a racist appeal. But many black voters intuitively understood that, with three blacks running, O’Brien would win if they did not coalesce behind a single opponent. In effect, a vote for Stroger or Brown, the Clerk of the Court, was a vote for O’Brien.

In the 20 black wards, turnout was 142,493. Preckwinkle got 57,892 votes (40.6 percent), carrying 12 of 14 South Side wards. Stroger got 43,430 votes (30.4 percent), winning the 8th, 21st, 24th and 34th wards. Brown got 33,645 votes (23.6 percent), winning the 29th and 37th wards.

In the suburbs, Preckwinkle won the black-majority townships of Bloom, Bremen, Calumet, Proviso and Rich, getting 53.4 percent of the total suburban vote, to Stroger’s 8.6 percent and Brown’s 11.7 percent.

Representing the south Lakefront Hyde Park area, where Obama resides, Preckwinkle is an intellectual, not a streetwise black activist. But her goal was to get 40 percent of the black vote, and at least half of that number came from black voters who wanted to keep a black in the board presidency.

* The Daley/Madigan/Burke/Lipinski/Hynes Machine did not fare thee well.
Or did it? O’Brien, the elected 14-year president of the Metropolitan Water Reclamation District, is a longtime Daley ally with ties to the South Side. But he ran an insipid campaign, failing to establish himself as the principal alternative to Stroger. He promised to rescind the hated sales tax hike, but not cut additional taxes or spending.

To win, O’Brien needed to be a demagogue. He needed to make a vote for him a vote against Stroger. He needed to make promises that appealed to white middle-class voters. He didn’t. And getting an anemic 23 percent of the countywide vote means his future political prospects are nil.

O’Brien did, however, carry ten city wards and six townships. He won the mayor’s 11th Ward (51.2 percent), Ed Burke’s 14th Ward (53.5 percent), Mike Madigan’s 13th Ward (42.1 percent), Bill Lipinski’s 23rd Ward (54.4 percent), and Tom Hynes’ 19th Ward (46.3 percent). But even in those wards, Preckwinkle ran well, getting 36.3 percent in the 11th, 27 in the 14th, 36.1 in the 13th, 36.4 in the 19th, and 31.8 in the 23rd Ward.

Pre-primary rumors abounded that Mayor Daley really wanted a black board president going into the 2011 mayoral election, so as to minimize black discontent. If so, he got his wish. If Daley wanted O’Brien to win, he would have gotten 70 percent in those wards.

* Adios, idiota. As in the 2008 Obama-McCain election, Chicago area Hispanics showed no hesitation in supporting a black (Preckwinkle) over Stroger. In the eight Hispanic-majority wards, which cast 30,826 votes, Preckwinkle got 13,795 votes (44.7 percent), to O’Brien’s 9,127 (29.6 percent) and Stroger’s 2,207 (7.1 percent). However, O’Brien won suburban Cicero (45.7 percent) and Stickney (56.7 percent) townships.

As with white ethnics, Hispanics clearly wanted to be rid of Stroger, and Preckwinkle was the best instrument.

* Whites will vote for the least objectionable black, especially if it means ousting the most objectionable black. On Chicago’s Northwest Side, where O’Brien, as the sole white candidate, was presumed to have appeal, only three wards carried for him: The 45th Ward, where O’Brien got 47.8 percent (3,827 votes), to Preckwinkle’s 43.5 percent; the 36th Ward, where O’Brien got 45.9 percent (3,341 votes), to Preckwinkle’s 38.6 percent; and the 41st Ward, where O’Brien got 51.9 percent (5,030 votes), to Preckwinkle’s 41.6 percent. Preckwinkle won the 32nd Ward (66.3 percent), 33rd Ward (55.5 percent), 38th Ward (49.4 percent), 39th Ward (49.8 percent), 40th Ward (56.9 percent), 47th Ward (67.5 percent), and 50th Ward (51.3 percent).

Why did Preckwinkle do so well? Four reasons: First, Stroger was deemed an abomination. He had to go. Second, O’Brien failed to click as a candidate. Third, Preckwinkle, by campaign’s end, loomed as the frontrunner. For voters determined to oust Stroger, a Preckwinkle vote did the deed, while an O’Brien vote was a waste.

And fourth, as demonstrated in the 2004 U.S. Senate primary (won by Obama) and the 2008 presidential primary (also won by Obama), there are substantial numbers of independents and liberals in the area who will vote for a non-white, non-conservative candidate.

“She (Preckwinkle) has never voted independently of (Mayor) Daley, has never implemented any reforms, and has not actually changed anything,” said Roger Keats, the former state senator who is the Republican candidate for board president. “I am change. She is business-as-usual.”

Another platitude: You can’t beat somebody – however vacuous – with nobody. Preckwinkle is the midget-killer, the woman who purged Todd Stroger. To many, she’s the good Samaritan. Keats is unknown, and it will cost him $2 million to run a viable campaign.

A final platitude: Perception defines reality. Preckwinkle is perceived by a plethora of adjectives: independent, competent, and a reformer. Like Obama, her platitudes may not presage her performance. But they are enough to enable her to win in November.

Ald. Berny Stone Defends Nepotism: "They All Hate Us Anyhow."

In the wake of a Chicago Tribune investigative report which showed that Chicago Aldermen were hiring relatives and political cronies from a $1.3 million stealth fund, the Chicago City Council voted Feb. 11th to discontinue the practice.

The little noticed Finance Committee slush fund enabled the Alderman to circumvent Federal Court oversight of the city's hiring practices and which outlaw such favoritism. By using the stealth account, Aldermen managed to hire at least 2 fathers, a mother and a daughter and a bevy of favored ward heelers including one on the city's "do-not-hire" list for sexual harassment charges.

Alderman Isaac Carothers, who recently resigned after pleading guilty in federal court to bribery charges, implied that the practice is more widespread saying, "All us Aldermen have family members on the payroll -- that's nothing new."

Chicago Aldermen have long been the subject of popular derision. Mike Royko, perhaps Chicago's all-time greatest journalist used to call them "Alderboobs" and pea-brained.

So it was no great surprise when, during the debate on the measure, one of the defenders of the nepotistic practice, Alderman Berny Stone (D-50th)should put forth one of the most novel defenses for shady political practices ever uttered by man.

"The general public's opinion of the aldermen themselves is so low, that if you are going to sit and worry about what their opinion is of hiring members of the aldermen's family, it's probably no greater than it is of the aldermen, "Stone said.

In other words: "They all hate us anyhow -- so why bother to reform?"

When you think of it, Stone's philosophic defense of the Chicago Way is kind of liberating. Kind of refreshingly nihilistic. It has kind of an Alfred E. Neumann, "What Me Worry?" tinge to it.

Reminds me of Randy Newman's satiric "Political Science" song from his 1972 Sail Away album. In it he advocated nuking the entire world.

"They all hate us anyhow
So Let's drop the big one now.
Let's drop the big one now."

Alderman Berny Stone (who has a daughter on his Aldermanic payroll)was first elected to the City Council back in 1973 when Randy Newman's debut album was first working its way up the charts.

Maybe that's what gave him the idea.

Illegal Alien Lobby Rallies for IL State Income Tax Hike

"We need a path to citizenship for the undocumented people who are working and contributing with their sweat and paying their taxes." Joshua Hoyt, Director, IL Coalition for Immigrant and Refugee Rights 1/15/10

"They (illegal aliens)are paying taxes anyway, even if they are using other's Social Security or fake Social Security or whatever, they are paying taxes" NPR Ap 17, 2007

The poor beleagured Illinois illegal alien! As if he didn't have enough trouble with Barack Obama backing off his pledge to put amnesty on the legislative front burner and with the ever present threat that he might be detained by ICE for possible deportation with his next traffic stop and with the downturn in the construction and restaurant economy -- he now finds that even his own leaders want to increase his taxes.

That's right, the state's principal advocacy groups for immigrants rights were down in Springfield last week as part of a larger coalition of labor and social welfare groups, urging our legislators to pass HB 174. That bill would increase the state income tax from 3% to 5% on individuals.

Here are the immigrant welfare advocacy groups that signed on to the "Responsible Budget Coalition," which assembled in the state Capitol last week to demand that we all shell out more in state income taxes:

Coalition of African, Arab, Asian, European and Latino Immigrants of Illinois - El Valor Corporation ~ Esperanza Community Services ~ Heartland Alliance for Human Needs & Human Rights ~ Illinois Coalition for Immigrant & Refugee Rights ~ Latino Consortium ~ Latino Organization of the Southwest ~ Latino Policy Forum ~ McHenry Co. Latino Coalition ~ Mujeres Latinas en Acción ~ ~Polish American Association ~~ Proveedores en Acción para Nuestros Niños ~ ~ South Asian Progressive Action Collective ~

For years, Joshua Hoyt, the state's chief illegal alien dissembler, has been telling us that illegal aliens pay taxes just like everyone else. Even more so, he says, since they have no hope of retrieving their social security taxes.

So why then is he, along with every other immigrant welfare outfit, working feverishly to increase income taxes?

Could it be that old Josh may just have been spewing out so much prevaricating hogwash all along?

Could it be that that just as immigration control advocates have been arguing all along, immigration poses a serious net drain on our ever declining public purse? That immigrants eat up far more in tax services that they pay in taxes?

Tax Eaters Rally in Springfield for Tax Increase

Today at 11 am, an aggregation of tax-dependent interest groups rallied in at the Capitol in Springfield to call on the General Assembly to increase the income tax rates for Illinois working people and businesses.

The main organizers of the event were the SEIU public employees union and Illinois' two teachers unions, the IFT and IEA. Calling themselves The Responsible Budget Coalition, they assembled a gaggle of other tax-dependent groups to call on lawmakers to support HB 174, a bill which would increase the state income tax for individuals from 3% to 5% and for corporations from 4.8% to 7.2%.

See a synopsis of the bill here.

The bill has already passed the State Senate 31-27 on May 30th and is currently sitting in the House Rules Committee awaiting further consideration.

The Coalition demanding a tax hike consists of a broad array of non-profit advocacy groups, ranging from the Chicago Democratic Socialists of America to the Illinois Coalition for Immigrant and Refugee Rights to the Featherfist homeless lobby group.

Apparently some in the coalition viewed the tax hike contained in HB 174 as being too paltry as the coalition mission statement calls for a tax increase "at least of that magnitude."

Here is a complete list of the organizations that are rallying today to increase your income taxes:


AARP Illinois ~ A Safe Haven ~ Access Living ~ Action Now ~ Ada S. McKinley Community Services, Inc. ~ AFSCME Council 31 ~ AFSCME Retirees Chapter 31 ~ AIDS Foundation of Chicago ~ Albany Park Neighborhood Council ~ Allendale Association ~ Alliance to End Homelessness in Suburban Cook County ~ Alternative Schools Network ~ Alternatives, Inc. ~ Amalgamated Transit Union Local 308 ~ Anixter Center ~ Arts Alliance Illinois ~ Bethany for Children & Families ~ Bethel New Life ~ Better Funding for Better Schools Coalition ~ Business and Professional People for the Public Interest ~ Carole Robertson Center for Learning ~ Center for Economic Progress ~ Centers for New Horizons ~ Chestnut Health Systems ~ Chicago Alliance Against Sexual Exploitation ~ Chicago Alliance to End Homelessness ~ Chicago Chapter Coalition of Labor Union Women ~ Chicago Coalition for the Homeless ~ Chicago Coalition of Site Administered Child Care Programs~ Chicago Democratic Socialists of America ~ Chicago Jobs Council ~ Chicago Legal Advocacy for Incarcerated Mothers ~ Chicago Metropolitan Battered Women's Network ~ Children's Home + Aid ~ ChildServ ~ Citizen Action/Illinois ~ Coalition of African, Arab, Asian, European and Latino Immigrants of Illinois ~ Coalition of Citizens with Disabilities in Illinois ~ Community Behavioral Healthcare Association ~ Community Counseling Center of Northern Madison County ~ Community Health Partnership of Illinois ~ Community Renewal Society ~ Connections for Abused Women and their Children ~ Cornerstone Services, Inc. ~ Counseling Center of Lake View ~ Deborah’s Place ~ Delta Center, Inc. ~ ED-RED (Education - Research - Development) ~ 8th Day Center for Justice ~ El Valor Corporation ~ Emergency Fund ~ Equip for Equality ~ Erie Neighborhood House ~ Esperanza Community Services ~ Families’ and Children’s Aids Network ~ Family Focus ~ FEATHERFIST ~ Federation for Community Schools ~ FITE Center for Independent Living ~ Gads Hill Center ~ Good News Community Kitchen ~ Good Shepherd Center ~ Grassroots Collaborative ~ Greene County Health Department ~ Grow Your Own Illinois ~ Health and Disability Advocates ~ Heartland Alliance for Human Needs & Human Rights ~ Hesed House/PADS, Inc. ~ HMPRG Center for Long Term Care Reform ~ Home of Life M.B. Church ~ Housing Action Illinois ~ Housing Opportunities for Women ~ Housing Options of Evanston ~ ICIRR ~ IFF ~ Illinois Action for Children ~ Illinois African American Coalition for Prevention ~ Illinois Alliance for Retired Americans ~ Illinois Assistive Technology Program ~ Illinois Association for Gifted Children ~ Illinois Association of Community Action Agencies ~ Illinois Association of Rehabilitation Facilities, Inc. ~ Illinois Association of School Nurses ~ Illinois Association of School Social Workers ~ Illinois Association of Rehabilitation Facilities, Inc. ~ Illinois Caucus for Adolescent Health ~ Illinois Center for Violence Prevention ~ Illinois Coalition for Immigrant & Refugee Rights ~ Illinois Education Association ~ Illinois Federation of Teachers ~ Illinois Library Association ~ Illinois Library Systems Director's Organization ~ Illinois Maternal & Child Health Coalition ~ Illinois Network of Centers for Independent Living ~Illinois Valley Center for Independent Living ~ IMPACT CIL ~ INCCRRA ~ ~ Inspiration Corporation ~ Interdependent Living Solutions Center ~ Interfaith Housing Center of the Northern Suburbs ~Jacksonville Area Center for Independent Living ~ Jane Addams Hull House Association ~ Jewish Council on Urban Affairs ~Lake County Center for Independent Living ~ Lake County Housing Action Coalition ~ Lakeside Community Development Corporation ~ Large Unit District Association ~ Latino Consortium ~ Latino Organization of the Southwest ~ Latino Policy Forum ~ League of Women Voters Illinois ~League of Women Voters of Wheaton, IL ~ Legislative Education Network of DuPage ~ Lewis & Clark Library System ~ Liberated Inc. ~ LIFE Center for Independent Living ~ Lifelink Corporation ~ LINC INC ~ Logan Square Neighborhood Association ~ Lutheran Advocacy-Illinois ~ Lutheran Child and Family Services of Illinois ~ Lutheran Social Services of Illinois ~ Madison County Continuum of Care ~ Marillac Social Center ~ McHenry Co. Latino Coalition ~ Mujeres Latinas en Acción ~ NAMI Illinois ~ NAMI of Greater Chicago ~ National Association of Social Workers Illinois Chapter ~ New Foundation Center, Inc. ~ North Suburban Teachers Union (IFT/AFT Local 1274)~ North Suburban Library System ~ Northwest Neighborhood Federation ~ Older Women's League (OWL) ~ OWL Northeast Chicago Chapter ~ Opportunities for Access ~ Ordinary People NFP ~ Ounce of Prevention Fund ~PACE, Inc. Center for Independent Living ~ Peace and Justice Committee ~ Pediatric Aids Chicago Prevention Initiative ~ Planned Parenthood of Illinois ~Polish American Association ~ Prevention First ~ Project IRENE ~ Project Oz ~ Protestants for the Common Good ~ Proveedores en Acción para Nuestros Niños ~ ~Renaissance Women ~ Rosecrance Health Network ~ Safer Foundation ~ St. Vincent De Paul Center ~ Sargent Shriver National Center on Poverty Law ~ SEIU Healthcare Illinois and Indiana ~ SEIU Illinois Council ~ Self Advocacy Council of Northern Illinois ~ Society of the Holy Child Jesus ~ South Asian Progressive Action Collective ~ South Cooperative Organization for Public Education ~ SouthSTAR Services ~ Springfield Center for Independent Living ~ Statewide Independent Living Council of Illinois ~ Supporting Illinois Brothers and Sisters ~ Supportive Housing Providers Association ~ TASC, Inc. ~ Test Positive Aware Network ~ The ARC of Illinois ~ The Center ~ The Hope Institute for Children and Families ~ The Night Ministry ~ The Resurrection Project ~ Thresholds ~ Through A Child’s Eyes Pre-K Program ~ UNITE HERE Local 1 ~ United African Organization ~ United Power for Action and Justice ~ Voices for Illinois Children ~ Will-Grundy Center for Independent Living ~ Women Employed ~ Women + Girls Collective Action Network ~ Youth Guidance ~ Youth Network Council ~Youth Organizations Umbrella ~ YWCA Metropolitan Chicago ~ YWCAs Illinois ~ Zion Development Corporation

A perusal of the list clearly suggests the self-interested nature of the call for tax increases as virtually all of the members are tax-exempt 501(c)3 organizations dependent on government largesse.

Old Ben Franklin proferred two foresightful observations on events such as we're seeing today in Springfield:

"When the people find that they can vote themselves money, that will herald the end of the republic."

and

"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote."

The Knack's Fieger Dies at 57

Doug Fieger, front man for the New Wave group, the Knack and co-author of the 1979 #1 hit, My Sharona, died yesterday of lung cancer.

The song was written for a 17 year old girl with whom he became obsessed. After she grew up a bit, they became very good friends (wink, wink, nudge, nudge, yaknowwhatimean?.) It was my favorite song of that year, re-capturing, it seemed to me, the clarity and straightforward simplicity of mid-60s American and British-invasion rock.

I was dating a finishing school girl at the time who was two years older than this Sharona of musical repute. Her country-clubbing Texas mother gave me a disc of the song:

US Olympic Luge Team Adopts New Theme Song

Undaunted by the tragic death of Georgian Olympic luger, Nodar Kumaritshvili, and reassured by the pronouciamentos of International Olympic officials that while the fatal luge course was safe -- they now have improved it to be "extra-super safe" -- the US Olympic luge team, true American street daredevils that they are, unanimously voted to adopt the following song as their official theme:



"Well the last thing I remember, doc, I started to swerve
And then I saw the luge slide into the curve
I'll never forget that horrible sight
I guess I found out that everyone was right
WON'T COME BACK FROM DEAD MAN'S CURVE !!"

Brady Covering His Tracks on Illegal Alien Support

Smarting from primary election criticisms over his past votes for measures supporting the aspirations of Illinois' illegal alien population, apparent GOP Gubenatorial nominee, State Sen. Bill Brady last Wednesday introduced a bill to deny state mortgage loans to them.

The measure, SB 3457 (see detailed synopsis here)basically instructs the Illinois State Housing Development Authority not to buy mortgage loans made by banks or other lenders to illegal aliens.

The bill was referred to the nether regions of the Committee on Assignments, where, given the Democrat majority in the State Senate it is almost certain to never see the light of day.

But it would appear that Brady is trying to place a symbolic smokescreen around his past votes for three major bills that were avidly prized by illegal alien advocacy groups.

During the 93rd General Assembly, in April of 2003, Brady voted for the Illinois "Dream Act," (HB 60) which made illegal aliens eligible for in-state tuition rates at Illinois state universities. That bill, which was co-sponsored in the State Senate by one Barack Obama, handily passed both houses of the legislature and became law.

Then during the 94th General Assembly, in April of 2005, Brady voted with the Democrat majority to help pass the Matricula Consular bill, SB 1623, which permitted state agencies to accept ID documents issued by foreign governments, as acceptable ID for the provision of various state services. The foreign documentation is regularly used by illegal aliens who cannot legally acquire legitimate state identification cards.

Then during the 95th General Assembly, in May of 2007, Brady voted for HB 1744, which effectively precluded Illinois employers from using the federal E-Verify database to ascertain the legality of the work status of their prospective hires.

The Illinois measure, which passed handily, demands that the feds demonstrate that their system is 99% accurate within a 3 day response period, before Illinois employers can rely on it. (Isn't it truly heartening to see a state government that is teetering on the edge of bankruptcy, demand Prussian efficiency from another level of government?) The bill was eagerly sought by the Illinois Coalition for Immigrant and Refugee Rights and others in the state's illegal alien lobby.

During the primary campaign, Brady was excoriated in the conservative blogosphere for these votes and began to take hits from several of his GOP rivals on this score.

According to the Federation for American Immigration Reform, as of 2007 there were 775,000 illegal aliens in Illinois and on a net basis, they cost the state government $3.5 billion annually.

In a time of high unemployment, rising educational costs and looming state budgetary disaster, these costs take on a higher level of salience than in the past.

Consequently, Brady dropped his symbolic bill to "get tough" on prospective illegal alien home mortgagees last week to cover his tracks.

Political analyst, Jeff Berkowitz characterized Democrat Pat Quinn's positions on illegal alien control as being "predictably liberal."

So it would seem that for yet another election cycle, Illinois voters will not likely be presented with a serious debate over the impact of illegal aliens. Nor, once again, will they likely be presented with meaningful philosophic and policy alternatives.

But the but the 800 pound gorilla is still in the room.

Happy Chicago St. Valentine's Day

What other city on the face of the earth can boast such a rich St. Valentine's day heritage? And even glorify its sinister past on the pop music charts?



Happy (frigid) Chicago St. Valentine's Day everybody!

ABBA Fans Strike Back

Most Americans would find this amazing, but there are a sizable number of people out there -- mostly in backwashes like Australia, Canada and Europe -- who actually still like, in fact, even idolize and revere the 70s-vintage Euro pop act, ABBA.

I discovered this when I went to research several pieces that I did arguing the absurdity of ABBA's impending induction into Jann Wenner's Rock 'n roll Hall of Fame.

The archived critiques can be seen here: and here:

There are literally hundreds of websites and blogs devoted to the worship of the Swedish quartet -- many of them still quite active and not all products of the official ABBA business consortium.

It is interesting to note that of the many hundreds who read the most recent critique, fewer than 25% were from the USA. That's understandable, given the fact that, aside from the pre-adolescent teeny-bop crowd, ABBA attained comparatively very little public acceptance in the world's largest popular music market.

Many of the ABBA enthusiasts reacted to my critique with schoolyard taunts questioning the legitimacy of my familial origions or the viability of my mental condition. And some suggested interesting and unusual anatomical feats that I should consider performing on myself.

But a very few put forth, more or less, serious logical attempts to justify the ABBA induction travesty.

Here are several:


One Rudolf Ondrich from Europe wrote:

Hmmmmm. I do get that this is satire, but it is pretty crap.

And ABBA do belong in the HoF based on musical reasons.

There is nothing light and fluffy about the music of ABBA. The Album (1977), Super Trouper (1980) and The Visitors (1981) are all brilliant, well crafted albums. Most people make the assumption ABBA only wrote Mamma Mia or Dancing Queen over and over again, that is simply the most silliest idea one can have about the music of ABBA.

Here is my personal input – In the mid-19th Century the music of the composer Richard Wagner represented a new phase of music, whereas the music of the composer Johannes Brahms was considered much more conservative and old-fashioned. At the time, everyone considered the music of these two men to be totally separate and no one would say they are the same genre, (Old Style Vs New Style), whereas nowadays they are seen under the same umbrella (ie German Romanticism). Could one day Rock Vs Pop become one group of music?

And one anonymous female writer from abroad argued that ABBA were, far from being a female sexploitative glorified pole dancing act, a significant force for feminism and serious social commentary:

One of the many good things about ABBA was that they brought a lot of female viewpoints, previously unheard in music, out into the open, such as in Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! and even in Dancing Queen. The male dominated rock and roll scene up to that time( and even since) had and has an almost exclusively 100% male social viewpoint. As ABBA's career coincided with the Women's Liberation Movement of the 1970's, that makes ABBA a significant social commentator in music.

I guess this is the kind of artistically immortal German Classicism and poignant feminism of which they speak:



So, you see, once again, we silly Americans just don't get it and need the Europeans and 3rd Worlders to enlighten us.

We just couldn't fathom ABBA's profundity and biting social commentary.

No wonder the French think Jerry Lewis is a comedic genius and the Germans think David Hasselhoff is a serious actor and we effete Americans have cruelly overlooked their greatness.

And they also think that soccer is a serious sport.

WLS's Mancow for Cotto = Cubs' Brock for Broglio

A few hours ago WLS 890 AM announced that it would replace super shock-jock, Mancow Muller, with former Moody Bible divinity student and traffic news reader, Cisco Cotto in its 9 to 11 am morning slot.

WLS station manager, Michael Damsky told the Chicago Sun-Times that the move was designed to give the station a more consistent conservative talk sound.

In that he certainly succeeded as the diminutive Bible thumper, Cotto is certainly more consistently dull.

To be sure, WLS thoroughly misused the flamboyant talents of Mancow by pairing him with the wearisome, middle-aged former WBBM-AM newsreader, Pat Cassidy. In fact the odd couple of the Chicago airwaves almost came to actual on-air blows on several occasions during their stormy year and a half together.

Cotto is the darling of the religious right-to-life mavens of the Illinois Review and certainly will provide a predictably conservative lead-in to Rush Limbaugh at 11 am. But Mancow may have provided the most incisive and witty libertarian-conservative critique of the Chicago Way ever to have been heard here. He once almost had leftist Congressperson, Jan Schakowsky in tears.

And with the exception of WGN's Garry Meier and WCPT's Jake Hartford (both of whom also were cut loose by the dour WLS), Mancow was the only genuine funny AM presence in Chicago.

The CST's media critic, Lewis Lazare, wrote that the sacking of Mancow was an attempt by WLS to shore up its flagging ratings among 25 to 54 year old adult listeners.

Oh, yea, this is going to work.

Just as it did for Cubs' General Manager, John Holland who in 1964 set out to shore up the Cubs shaky starting rotation by trading a young left fielder by the name of Lou Brock for an ailing right handed starter by the name of Ernie Broglio.

That season, Brock (whose talents were underutilized by the Cubs, much as Mancow's by WLS) sparked the Cardinals to a World Championship with 20+ steals and a .315 batting average.

That same year, Broglio posted a 4-7 record with a 4.04 ERA for the Cubs who finished a dismal 8th place in the then 10 team NL. He was out of baseball in a year and a half.

Brock, of course, went on to have a stellar career and was inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown in 1985.

I trust that Bruce DuMont has Mancow's niche ready at the Radio Hall of Fame at the Museum of Broadcast Communications on North La Salle St., because the nationally syndicated superjock will almost certainly end up there.

And Cisco Cotto can be hired to dust off Mancow's plaque and conduct tours.

Did ABBA Make Kiddie Porn?

Readers of this blog know that I have been waging an energetic campaign against ABBA's election into the Rock n' Roll Hall of Fame since the preposterous notion first surfaced. My efforts seemed to have come to naught with the December announcement that the Swedish teeny-bop popsters would be inducted into the 2010 class this coming March.

It seems that the Rock Hall of Fame's chieftain, Rolling Stone's Jan Wenner stacked the deck in ABBA's favor. Seems he thinks that old videos of Agnetha Faltskog wiggling her magnificent Nordic derriere will do more for the induction show's VH-1 ratings than videos of the Moody Blues or Jethro Tull or some other worthy, but as yet uninducted genuine rock band.

The thought of the Euro ear-candy purveyors sharing the same status as John Lennon, Buddy Holly and Chuck Berry is appalling to say the least.

But after exhaustive research, I have unearthed evidence that may forestall this unhappy development. You see, ABBA shamelessly promoted Lolitaism. It actually celebrated the notion of schoolchildren having liaisons with their teachers.

In the weeks leading up to the Who's Superbowl performance, a group of Holy Rollers began protesting Peter Townsend's appearance, citing his 1983 arrest for allegedly downloading child pornography. He was acquitted.

But the Swedish schlockmeisters, ABBA, it turns out, actually thought intimate relations between underaged students and their teachers was cute.

Look at the lyrics to one of their early teeny-bop offerings called, "When I Kissed the Teacher:"

One of these days
Gonna tell him I dream of him every night
One of these days
Gonna show him I care, gonna teach him a lesson alright

I was in a trance when I kissed the teacher
Suddenly I took the chance when I kissed the teacher
Leaning over me, he was trying to explain the laws of geometry
And I couldn't help it, I just had to kiss the teacher

And Agnetha and Anna-Frid really Lolita-ed it up in this old video:



I am calling on the morality police to demand that Jann Wenner rescind his Hall of Fame honors for the purveyors of this outright smut.

And I am calling on the AFT and NEA to denounce this incitement of teachers to engage in conduct that is outlawed by the Illinois Human Rights Act.

That's right. This Act was designed to safeguard us from the horrors of sexual harassment. Among many other things it outlaws "unwelcome advances or conduct of a sexual nature and requests for sexual favors by an executive, faculty member, adminstative staff member or teaching assistant."

The Illinois Department of Human Rights has a whole big bureaucracy in place to enforce this Act and bring down the wrath of God onto the sex-crazed didacts who might violate its spirit.

So it is clear that ABBA in the above video was engaging in the most egregious advocacy of clearly illegal activity.

On that basis alone they are not worthy of the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame.

And also because they were not real rock 'n rollers.

Should Chicago's Jews Apologize for Scott Lee Cohen?

Mickey Cohen was a murderous Jewish gangster during the wild and woolley days of prohibition-era gangster violence.

He suffered a well deserved death by tommy-gun execution at the hands of fellow mobsters.

But if he could be reincarnated and fast-forwarded to 2010 -- he could probably dig up some of his buried cash, use it to run for high public office, be readily embraced by Chicago's Jewish community -- and get elected!!

After all -- doesn't matter who he was -- or what he did -- or who he killed -- just good enough that he has a Jewish name!!!

Much has been made of the fact that in the 6 man race for Illinois Lt. Governor, the Latino candidate, Thomas Michael Castillo, prevailed in the largely Latino communities. He carried heavily Mexican Cicero with 42% of the vote to Turner's 30% and Cohen's 18%.

And it has been mentioned that the 2 black candidates, State Sen. Art Turner and State Rep. Rickey Hendon, cleaned up in the black communities.

In Calumet Township, Turner polled 36% and Hendon 26% with the whites and Latino far behind.

But apparently the strictures of political correctness have constrained the mainstream media from mentioning that Scott Lee Cohen was the wildly overwhelming favorite of Chicago's Jewish community.

He had no experience in politics, no involvement in Chicago's Jewish community -- but he did have a Jewish name.

And he did have the same political consultants, Grainger Terry, who squeaked out a win for Alderman Berny Stone (the landlord's Alderman) last election in Chicago's 50th Ward.

So of the 50 Wards in Chicago -- guess in which one Cohen triumphed overwhelmingly?

In the "Golden Ghetto", Alderman Berny Stone's heavily Jewish 50th Ward. The Democrat Committeeman there is a religiously Orthodox Jew and politically ultra-liberal, State Sen. Ira Silverstein.

There Cohen garnered a full 48% of the vote -- compared to peanuts for the non-Jewish candidates.

And of the 30 Cook County Townships -- in which one do you think pawnbroker Cohen cleaned up?

It was in Niles Township, with its heavy representation of Jewish voters in Skokie, Lincolnwood and Morton Grove. It gave the steroid pumping pawnbroker his #1 Township vote total with 43% for him and scraps for the other five Democrats.

This hasn't been a good 12 months for the Chicago Jewish Community. Many high rollers therin and serious Chicago Jewish philanthropic groups lost a lot of their savings by having put their faith in Berny Madoff, whom the Chicago Jewish News on its front page called, "The World's Worst Jew."

Now the Chicago Jewish community has its knee-jerk ethnocentric Democrat support for Scott Lee Cohen to explain away.

Here's a novel concept -- why not consider not always voting Democrat for a change? Perhaps then, it would broaden the Jewish base of options so that Chicago Jews could vote for ethnically kindred spirits who did not (allegedly) accost prostitutes with knives, abandon their wives and children and engage in the shadiest of entrepreneurial endeavors?

(More on this later in the next post where we assess the Jewish vote in Highland Park and Glencoe for Democrat, high school dropout, pawnbroker, Cohen vs. that for 40year old, Republican, University of Chicago, MD graduate, pediatrician, father of
5, observant Jew and former US Navy Fighter pilot, Dr. Arie Friedman. -- Need I tell you which Jewish candidate Jewish voters preferred there? -- Stay tuned.)

A Chicagoan Looks At Washington D.C.'s Snowtime Comedy Capers

There are precious few endeavors at which Chicagoans can snidely proclaim their superiority. Certainly not in the realms of judicious choice of civic leadership or in professional baseball prowess.

But Chicagoans are pretty good at contending with the snow. God knows they get enough practice. The denizens of Washington D.C. are not.

In fact Washingtonians are laughably inept by our standards.

That is why I have to laugh at the thought of Washington D.C. today having to endure an onslaught of up to 3 feet of snow.

Washington is a Southern city. It was carved out of pieces of Virginia, capitol of General Robert E. Lee's Great Commonwealth and bits of the Southern part of Maryland.

It is crawling with people from the sun drenched Carolinas and Texas and Georgia who work in Congress and the bureaucracies. It is home to thousands of diplomats from such balmy places as Nigeria, Sri Lanka and Brazil.

These people are clueless when it comes to handling snow.

I spent more than a decade in that city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm and I can attest to this.

During my first year there, my Cheesehead Wisconsinite roomate and I were listening to the radio one winter morning before work and the D.C. radio jocks were feverishly going on and on about a "snow emergency." They were rattling off the lists of schools and workplaces that were closed. They were issuing dire warnings to stay huddled inddors, if at all possible.

Then we walked up the stairs of our English Basement apartment into the DC morning to see 3 inches of snow on the ground. 3 inches!!! The Cheesehead immediately laughed and proclaimed: "Snow Emergency???"

DC denizens do not know how to drive in the snow.

Their immediate response to getting stuck in a snow rut is to floor the pedal and create an intractable ice patch in which they then will be truly stuck.

No one apparently ever taught the drivers ed students of Atlanta and Zambia that you do not turn the steering wheel in the opposite direction to correct a skid.

Consequently, the scenic DC Rock Creek Parkway is today, almost certainly resembling the demolition derby event I once witnessed in Elkhart, Wisconsin.

DC denizens do not know how to shovel snow.

Up and down my block in Upper Northwest DC, I would see people trying to clear their sidewalks with brooms and dustpans.

One South Carolina woman I knew in DC tried to eradicate the ice on her front steps by pouring hot water on it!! This in sub freezing temps.

And as for municipal snow removal from the streets -- forget about it. The DC municipal government which is a paragon of inefficiency and ineptitude in the best of times (remember Mayor Marion Barry?) is the municipal equivalent of Moe, Larry and Curly when it comes to street plowing.

Snow will usually have to wait to melt on the sidestreets before DC will ever get around to clearing it.

And DC people apparently don't even know that snowballs are not lethal weapons. This was comically illustrated several weeks ago when a black DC cop was filmed pulling his gun on a bunch of snowball-fighting college kids, because his car had just been hit by a snowball.

But the funniest thing is the response of the Federal bureaucrats to the "snow emergency" announcements.

On days with any snow accumulation, the federal agencies announce that they are closed except for "essential personnel," who are expected to summon up the bravery and pluck of Admiral Byrd of the Arctic and somehow manage to master the elements and come to work.

Since no bureaucrat ever wants to concede that his or her very presence on the job is not absolutely vital to the very life of the Republic, the bureaucracies have extremely low absentee rates when that "snow emergency" announcement is made.

I am not making this up.

Ding Dong The Witch is Dead: RINO Coulson Beaten in GOP Primary

The poster child for liberal Republican RINOism, State Rep. Elizabeth Coulson, was beaten in yesterday's 10th Congressional District primary election to fill the seat held by Cong. Mark Kirk. She had been endorsed by former Governor Jim Edgar and was favored to win. She was beaten by conservative Kenilworth businessman, Bob Dold, who will now face off against perennial candidate, Democrat Dan Seals, in the general election.

Apparently not enough NARAL abortion activists, Sierra Club environmental wackos, multiculturalist mavens, anti-2nd Amendment gun grabbers and general nanny-state enthusiasts could be induced to take a Republican ballot, thereby depriving Coulson of her customary base vote.

Since she was precluded by law from simultaneously running for re-election for her state legislative seat, she is now out of public life.





Ding Dong! The Witch is dead.
Which old Witch? The Wicked Witch!
Ding Dong! The Wicked Witch is dead.

Wake up - sleepy head,
rub your eyes, get out of bed.
Wake up, the Wicked Witch is dead.

She's gone where the goblins go,
Below - below - below.
Yo-ho, let's open up and sing
and ring the bells out.

Ding Dong' the merry-oh,
sing it high, sing it low.

Let them know
The Wicked Witch is dead!


Lyrics by: E. Yip Harburg (Edgar Yipsel H.)
Music by: Harold Arlen (b. Hyman Arluck)
From the Film: The Wizard Of Oz 1939 (M)

The Lampoon 2010 Voter's Guide: Choosing by Anagram

Frankly, I am sick of the campaign season. I am sick of getting pummelled by campaign ads.

Since we can't help but hear them, now we know that Andy McKenna is an "outsider" even tho he was the State Chairman of the Republican Party and his megabucks daddy knows and is shaking down every corporate high roller in the five county Chicago area to pay for those ads.

And we now know that every Republican candidate is going to hold the line on taxes and every Democrat is going to clean up the corruption in Springfield and transform Cook County government into a pristine model of good governance to rival that of the ancient Greek city-states.

We hear that big-spender Elizabeth Coulson has newly discovered the joys of opposing tax hikes and that Toni Preckwinkle will cut her own salary, if elected, even tho she voted 4 times to raise her salary before.

And how is it that all the Lt. Governor and comptroller candidates are now going to become jobs creation czars? Last I heard the job descriptions for those useless posts called respectively for going to funerals in the Governor's absence and putting the right check into the right envelope.

Anyone who believes even of tenth of the campaign blather we're hearing probably was excitedly nodding his head in agreement when the hellish Nixon solemnly declared, "I am not a crook," and when the absurd Jimmy Carter heaved up, "I will never lie to you."

The true believers probably felt Chris Matthew's girlish excitement and leg quivers when Geo. Bush The First somberly pronounced, "Read my lips. No new taxes!!" Or when Obama the Magnificent promised to close Guantanamo no later than Jan. 21, 2010.

But we must vote Tuesday. It is our civic duty -- especially if we ever want the Alderman to give us a new garbage can or to patch a gaping pothole. You see, they keep track.

So as long as we must vote, we might as well have a few laughs.

I say, vote for the candidate who has the funniest name when you rearrange all the letters.

Herewith is the Chicago Lampoon's sample ballot of anagramatic candidate names. If you don't believe me, just check out all the letters and you'll see that they all add up. Vote early and often for the ones that make you bust a gut. You may take this with you into the polling place.

DEMOCRATIC PARTY

U.S. SENATE (Vote for 1)

Alexi Giannoulias --- (Asexual Ani Oiling)
Robert Marshall --- (Rambler Harlots)
Cheryle Jackson --- (Shy Jock Cleaner)
Jacob J. Meister --- (Ejects a Rim Job)
David Hoffman --- (Hid Off Mad Van)

GOVERNOR (Vote for 1)

Pat Quinn --- (Nut Pan Qi)
Daniel W. Hynes --- (Had Nils Weeny)

Congress 10th District (Vote for 1)

Daniel J. Seals --- (A Endless Jail)
Julie Hamos --- (He Jam Oil Us)

REPUBLICAN PARTY

U.S. SENATE (Vote for 1)

Kathleen Thomas --- (Make Health Snot)
Mark Steven Kirk --- (RE: Mark's Vet Kink)
Andy Martin --- (Tinny Drama)
Donald (Don) Lowery --- (Worn Addled Loony)
John Arrington --- (Tinhorn Jargon)
Patrick J. Hughes --- (Chap Her Jugs, Kit)

GOVERNOR (Vote For 1)

Bill Brady --- (Blab Drily)
Kirk W. Dillard --- (Wild Lark, Dirk)
Adam Andrzejewski --- (I Jerk Amazed Wands)
Andy McKenna --- (Damn Any Neck)
Dan Proft --- (Fart Pond)
Jim Ryan ---(In My Jar)

CONGRESS 10th District(Vote For 1)

Arie Friedman --- (Nerdier Mafia)
Paul Hamann --- (Anal Ham Pun)
Dick Green --- (Cinder Keg)
Robert Dold --- (Border Dolt)
Elizabeth Coulson* --- (A Sullen Ethnic Bozo)

*Elizabeth Coulson provides too many wild anagrams to list here including many that would be offensive to children or sensitive readers. So here they are:

(The Ozone Bacillus, Cuties Blazon Hole, A Bullies Hot Cozen, Too Sizeable Lunch, Baize Colon Sleuth, Colonize Able Tush, Absolute Zinc Hole, A Schizo Bone Tulle, The Sizeable Uncool, A Bluenose Loch Zit, Incubates Zoo Hell, A Biz Counsel Helot, A Blueish Clot Zone and many many more.)

The anagramatic analysis of the Cook County Board(Toady Bunco Crook)Presidential candidates is proffered in the preceding post where, on the strength of her anagrams, Toni Preckwinkle (New Pinko Tickler) narrowly edged out Dorothy Brown (Born Rowdy Hot)for endorsement.