Car Repo Biz Booming in West Rogers Park/Lincolnwood

Last night, while quietly bicycling to the Rogers Park School park, mini-bikepath, I ran into an unusual occurrence. A Honda mini-van being repo-ed on the 2700 block of Chase Avenue.

This would have been considered aberrant for, usually sedate, West Rogers Park in more normal times --and and certainly for affluent Lincolnwood. But is apparently becoming a part of the social fabric during the new Obamanation.

I ran into an interesting fellow, named Elijah, who was as burly as the monstrous diesel-fueled tow truch that he was using to effect the bank repossession of the vehicle.

Eli -- as he called himself, was a scary looking, enourmously rotund, yet wildly muscular fellow. The sort of which would readily qualify for a WWE wrestling bout.

His closely cropped hair, earring and menacing body tattoos (one of which was the famous Grateful Dead's icon of a pot-smoking, rolling paper advertisement) made you think that this was surely the kind of guy that you would definitely want on your side in a free-for-all bar fight.

(Memo to self: Get Eli to go barhoppping with you next time you go to Wells St. or to Madison, WI. publick houses. And guarantee to pay for all his booze.)

But aside from looking menacing, he was a very articulate fellow. He apprised me as to the astounding rate at which bank repossession of cars is now occurring in even, usually solid neighborhoods like West Rogers Park, Chicago, Lincolnwood, IL and even posh, Sauganash, Chicago.

Eli apprised me that he was a native of West Rogers Park, a grad of St. Gertrude's School and Mather -- and seldom had had calls to perform his trade in his old neighborhood.

But on this night, he politely apprised the African-American, new and probably, sub-prime-mortgage, affirmative-action homeowner on Chase Ave., that he had legal and lawful papers for the banks repo of his Honda mini-van. Eli told me that the man was in the process of bank foreclosure on his newly acquired home.

The African-American gentleman asked Eli for a copy of the repo notice for his files. Eli demurred, saying it was not part of their standard repo procedure, but I intervened and said, "What the hell, Eli, let the poor guy make a copy for his files."

He did.

Eli apprised me that it was weird for repos to occur in areas like this, and even in Lincolnwood -- of all places.

More amusing details on that in tomorrow's piece, which will be entitled:

"Eli's coming,
hide your car girl,
Eli's coming
hide your car"

Until Tomorrow, when I'll have some rather amusing tales to relate as to Eli's re-po's of some really crazy charachters in West Roger's Park and his wild adventures re-poing a short-bed pickup truck from a family of Gypsy homeowners in Licolnwood.

I am just relating what he reported.

I am not making this stuff up.

It is too weaird for words.

But nothing should surpirse in the Brave New Obamanation.

This is, after all, Obama's Chicago.

Skunks in West Rogers Park

There are skunks in West Rogers Park.

Lots of them.

I am not talking about the octagenarian Alderman and do-nothing Vice-Mayor of the City of Chicago, Bernard "the Snoozer" Stone.

Nor am I talking about his rotund Ward Secretary (who is ostensibly in charge of riding herd on these matters) Alan "the Weasel" Crown.

Nor am I talking about the noisy political opponents, such as Zach "Vladimir Illyich" Schiffman, chair of the West Rogers Park Community Council and Soviet. Nor am I talking about the Socialist Democrat Ward Committeeman, Mrs. Silverstein's husband, Ira.

I am talking about the scores and, as the weather improves, soon to be hundreds of live, living skunks who populate and nocturnally frolic in the alleys, backyards and parks of the West Rogers Park section of Chicago.

I was sensitized to this issue by a neighbor and fellow dog-walker, Marc, who lives near the Rogers school. My Lab-mix, Mac and his collie Zach used to frolic together at the Rogers School Park.

They are both now passed on to the doggie heaven, and hopefully frolicking on there, but Marc and his wife are inveterate collie fanciers and have a new adoptee.

And he, like most dog walkers in our area, live in absolute terror of the skunks which have proliferated in our area.

This is no laughing matter.

When a dog approaches a skunk and is sprayed, one has to spend hours cleaning the noxious gasses from the dog's coat. It may take several days to thoroughly get it out.

Both Marc and I have had to do this as have innumerable dog owners in the Roger's School and Indian Boundary neighborhoods.

I have ridden my bike through the Rogers School Park late at night and have seen literally a half-dozen skunks, brazenly grazing in the field.

This is no laughing matter.

A family in Highland Park recently got a $500,000 settlement from their homeowners insurance policyholder, because a skunk burrowed into their house, rendered it inhabitable and essentially destroyed it.

This is no laughing matter.

But you would think it is if you listened to Alderman Snoozy's paid Ward Administrative Assistant, and daughter, Ilana "Leona Helmsley" Stone.

As most people in the 50th Ward know, this girl, who has all of the graciousness and elan of a Wendy Ward Charm School dropout (yes Montgomery Ward's used to have a "charm school" for teenage girls in the 60's) answered the phone at her daddy's Aldermanic office the other day.

She has an office there that is painted (I am not making this up) pink.

I asked her what the status was as per the skunk infestation of our neighborhood.

She said: "It is a state issue, you should call your State Senator."

This was an obvious barb at Mrs. Silverstein's husband, Ira, who recently out-Socialisted Ilana "Leona Helmsley" Stone's daddy to become the new 50th Ward Democrat Committeeman.

I said, "What do you mean it is a State issue, doesn't the City of Chicago have a well-funded Department of Animal Control?"

She said, "We can't even get traps from them for our people. If you really think there is a problem, call 311."

I said, "Well then what is the purpose of having a paid constituent service staff in the 50th Ward Alderman's office"

Stony (no pun intended) silence on the line.

So much for Alderman Snoozy's clout at City Hall and so much for the crack responsiveness of Miss "Leona Helmsley" Stone's constituent service operation.

I said, "Ilana, can I quote you on this?"

She blurted out, "No!"

So much for Alderman Snoozy's transparency.

So much for the openess of our liberal-Democrat, elected representative.

And so it goes.