Chicago Tourists Mugged by Trayvon Wannabees - Jesse J. Says Run Like Rabbits

Another exciting weekend in Chicago as an elderly tourist and her teen daughter were swarmed by a flash mob of budding young Trayvon Martins while shopping on the Mag mile.

When confronted by feral young black thugs,
just run like rabbits: Jesse Jackson to whites

They had only been in town for 4 hours before being surrounded by the feral offspring of assorted South Side black baby mamas who then stold their I Phone.

One of the white victims, a 15 year old Florida girl, decided to stand her ground, however, and bear hugged one of the miscreants holding on to him until police arrived.

According to the Chicago Tribune, the young gentleman, no doubt a CPS honors student, hit her repeatedly in the head and snarled, "We didn't take your phone, you white bitch, leave us alone."

But surely since the offender was black and the victim white, crack Democrat States Attorney Anita Alverez would never press hate crimes charges for this, now would she?

Meanwhile, across town at the Daley Center, the Rev. Jesse Jackson, who himself has sired an illegitimate creature with a baby mama, told a gaggle of perpetual victims of white racism and big Trayvon Martin fans that white people should flee like rabbits when faced with assaults like the above mentioned.

As Jackson so eloquently and logically put it, "Someone says you have the right to eliminate someone you disagree or don't like, we need to end the stand your ground law so it doesn't end us," he said.

Earlier this week Barack Obama called for a national discussion on race. The mulatto chief executive said that he, himself, had once been made to feel bad when followed by store security guards because of his race.

Happily, the gang of South side black teens who mugged the 51 year old woman tourist and her 15 year old daughter weren't made to feel bad by being watched closely by cops while looking for prey on North Michigan Avenue.

That, of course, would be racial profiling and that would make them feel unwelcome on Chicago's once Magnificent Mile.

Chicago Catholics Should Boycott Collection Plate Over Racist Priest Pfleger

During the Victorian era in Great Britain, the Church of England was jokingly referred to as "The Tory Party at Prayer."


Racist Catholic Priest Pfleger fans
flames of black anti-white bigotry 


Today, in Chicago, the Catholic Church in Gresham, known as St. Sabina, could realistically be called, "The Black Panther Party at Prayer."

That is because that 11th ward Roman Catholic enclave labors under the absurd tutelage of the ecclesiatic egomaniac and overt anti-white racist, Fr. Michael Pfleger.

This liturgical lunkhead has been at it again.

Now, in the wake of the lawful acquittal of the Sanford, Florida community watch volunteer, George Zimmerman, for shooting a black miscreant in self defense, Pfleger weighs in to the Chicago Tribune calling the jury's action, "A travesty."

Of course, in so doing, Pfleger was helping to fan the flames of anti-white racial hatred that has led to scores of physical attacks on innocent white people across the country.

This is just the latest in the pipsqueak pastor's abuse of his status as an ordained Catholic priest.

In the past, he has used his pulpit to rail against the 2nd amendment to the US constitution -- actually threatening to kill a gun store owner.

He has gone on the leftist NPR to berate his Church and Cardinal.

He has turned his Catholic Church's pulpit over to the anti-American, anti-white bigot, Jeremiah Wright.

He has praised and defended the notorious black racist, white hating Jew-baiter, Louis Farrakhan.


Anti-whites Pfleger and Farrakhan



He has berated white parents for being legitimately concerned for their children's safety in black Chicago enclaves.


And most curiously, this celebate, unmarried Catholic cleric has legally adopted 2 black boys - again, in defiance of his Cardinal.

How the current Cardinal Francis George justifies this, in light of the Illinois Catholic Church's refusal to allow gay men and women to adopt children, truly defies comprehension.

The milquetoast Cardinal George has repeatedly refused to discipline this clown.

Perhaps white Chicago Catholics, who are the financial mainstay of his diocese should send his church a message by the simple expedient of boycotting the Sunday collection plate until the racist bigot Pfleger is sent packing.

Maybe then the eunich Chicago Catholic Cardinal will be forced to grow a pair.

Beautiful Summer Weather in Chicago: Some Nice Summer Music

Annie M., one of our devoted regular Chicago Lampoon readers, which we are delighted to report now number well into the double digits, wrote in to say that we were too negative and snarky in tone.

A Beautiful Day in Chicago

"Why do you have to be so critical and negative all the time?" she queried. "If it were the most beautiful day ever, you would still find something to complain about."

We have to admit that she is right. We are too negative and snarky.

Weatherwise, this is truly a glorious day in Chicago -- 84 degrees, nary a cloud in the pastel blue sky --if every day were like this climatically, the place would be almost habitable -- its' crooked political climate nonwithstanding.

So in deference to Annie's wishes we are going to write a nice, non-critical, barely snarky article.

We are going to post videos of some of our favorite summer songs. Hope you enjoy them.

Here's Frank singing his great 1967 hit, The Summer Wind. In the 60s, when Sinatra wasn't punching out drunken audience hecklers in Las Vegas, he was turning out some great easy listening hits:



OK, I know it's kinda gay, but ABBA's Our Last Summer was really a nice tune:



Here's a pretty good video of Bryan Adam's really great hit from 1984 Summer of '69. Reportedly, the song was not about the chronological year 1969, but about something else:



Here's John Sebastian and the Lovin' Spoonful performing their 1966 hit Summer in the City on what looks like the Ed Sullivan show:



Here's Don Henley's Boys of Summer.

This brings back a flood of memories as it was omnipresent on the airwaves during the summer of 1984. That's when I would hear it on the radio of my great little MGB while driving along the Delaware oceanside with a tall athletic blond from Tennessee named Debbie Roberts who claimed to be related to General Douglas MacArthur and who had worked for then-Congressman Al Gore.

We spent much of that summer eating hardshell crab, drinking beer and making love at Dewey Beach, Delaware, but actually couldn't really stand each other. She once told me that the only really good thing about me was my car. Charming girl, that.



And here, courtesy of The Chicago Schlager Music Review is one of our favorite German performers, Ella Endlich, singing her 2010 release Der Sommer ist Da (The Summer is Here.)

Ella Endlich was born behind the Iron Curtain in Soviet-occupied East Germany in 1984. She has emerged as a mid level pop star in Free Germany and likes to wear 60s-retro attire and perform stuff that sounds like it's straight out of that era, so, you see, we didn't win the Cold War for nothin':



So there you have it. A celebration of beautiful Chicago summer weather with some nice summer songs.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled snarky, hypercritical Chicago Lampoon bloviation.

Where Have All The Fountains Gone? Obama's Economic Miasma at Work

A somewhat poetic journalist of the World War II era wrote of the early 1940's that "the lights have gone out all across Europe."

Despite our $4 a gallon gas and seemingly endless double digit unemployment, that can't be said of Obama's America - yet.

The Legion Park Fountain
in happier times

But it does seem that Obama-era austerity has caused the outdoor fountains to go off all across Northern Chicagoland.

Astoundingly, here, well into summer 2013, the large architectural fountain at Chicago's Legion Park reminds dry for want of repair.

And the same for the fountains at the Leaning Tower YMCA landmark in Niles.

The Legion Park fountain sets at the very corner of Lincoln Ave. and Peterson on Chicago's far north side. It occupies a site that was until recently, the locale of a notorious "no-tell motel" favored mostly by Russian prostitutes and their enthusiastic clientle.

About a decade ago, after one of the emigre ladies-of-the-evening was found stuffed in a suitcase along the adjoining MWRD canal -- quite dead -- the Peterson Park neighbors clamored for its demolition.

The Legion Park Fountain this morning

Mayor Richie Daley complied and had his Chicago Park District erect an enormous fountain there at the gateway to the adjoining Legion Park lands -- on the site of the demolished house of ill repute.

The fountain subsequently became a favorite of dog walkers, whose mutts would chill out in the waters and of burkha-clad South Asian women who used it as a wading pool for their kiddies.

They did this despite the "No swimming or wading sign" because the English language imperialists at the park district did not translate it into Urdu or Gujarati - so the non-English speaking "New Americans" don't know what the hell is going on.

The fountain had also become a favorite of Mexican and Filipino photographers who used it as a cheap backdrop for their wedding party photo shoots.

Most summer weekends you would see blushing third world brides with their entourages, all bedecked in garish finery and cheap shoes, smiling for the birdie in front of the fountain's gushing aquatic output.

But that has all stopped, because the Park District can't afford to fix the damned thing anymore.

And the same has happened at the Niles Leaning Tower YMCA.

No Gushing Water at the
Leaning Tower YMCA this summer

The Y there is fronted by an almost full scale replica of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

It was built by an eccentric millionaire in the 20's to compliment his elaborate gardens. His estate was purchased by the Y and the Leaning Tower remained as something of a Niles landmark.

But despite getting piles of federal money to house SSI welfare recipients, the Leaning Tower YMCA still has loads of rooms going begging and says it can't afford the upkeep on the gushing fountains.

This is somewhat disconcerting to the hordes of touristas who, almost daily, flock to the tower to snap digital photos to send back home. Presumably they think it might delude the folks back in Keokuk into thinking they actually vacationed to Italy.

But visually, the Niles Tower is almost as good and you are far less likely to have your purse snatched or pockets picked by gaggles of Gypsy children in Niles than in Pisa.

Anyway, it's apparently too costly to fix the damned thing there too, so no spewing waterworks this summer.

In 1919, the United States went dry under the hapless Democrat Woodrow Wilson, when alcoholic prohibition went into force.

Today, with its double digit unemployment and seemingly endless economic miasma, the United States is again, apparently going dry under the hapless Barack Obama.

And wasn't he supposed to be the "infrastructure President?"